Episode 183 - Ladybugs: LIVE!

[grudlian. 4725]

What other movie was done from 2017 besides Valerian and Fate of the Furious?

XXX 3

[sycasey 2.0 2301]

EDIT: Oh, I see Cam Bert has already made this point. Great minds!

[sycasey 2.0 2301]

I must correct Jason on one point:

 

In Twilight, it's not the BABY who imprints, it's Jacob the werewolf who imprints on the BABY. Which clearly makes much more sense, duh!

[grudlian. 4725]

I may be the only one, but one of the things about this movie that infuriated me was how they would keep objectively terrible players on the field instead of pulling someone from the bench. I know you have a crush on her and all, but she just kicked that ball ludicrously out of bounds. She really needs to go. How does Chester even begin to explain to those poor girls why they can't play while literal piles of garbage are on the field fucking up their chance at the Championship? All those girls want is to get out there on the pitch and be given one chance. Just one chance. "Oh, you don't want to hurt her feelings, what about my feelings coach? I can at least keep the ball inbounds. I could win this shit for us."

My understanding is all the players are objectively terrible. So, switching out players isn't going to make a huge difference. These girls seem to old to be at the age that everyone gets a chance to play though. So, I dont know.

[sycasey 2.0 2301]

Just to make things creepier in here, I'll note that Vinessa Shaw went on to play the prostitute in Eyes Wide Shut who helps save Tom Cruise from the masked sex party.

 

[Crummy Scrimmage 188]

If I'm not mistaken, when Matthew interrupts Chester's confession about not getting the promotion, he mentions to his mom that he joined a soccer team. That would explain his regular absence at home, but it's convenient that his mom shows ZERO interest in this revelation as the movie unfolds. Doesn't she ever want to see her son -- whom she admits is a driven and talented athlete -- play a game? She showed up at one of Chester's games -- though perhaps that was out of concern for why her septuagenarian fiance has taken a sudden interest in both soccer AND teenage girls.

 

Also, given his athletic experience, why doesn't Matthew wear a cup during a SOCCER GAME? His teammates weren't likely to notice the bulge, since picking up on blatant empirical evidence does not seem to be their collective strength.

[PollyDarton 1807]

I have a few things to say about this movie, but I'm at work so I'll talk about the thing that's easiest to quantify right now.

 

The entire sequence at the mall is completely arbitrary and does not need to exist (besides its potential for genitalia based comedy.)

 

 

There really is no reason for "Martha" to ever dress like a girl outside of the ladybug's practice and games and neither of those situations calls for that fucking Laura Ashley nightmare that they try on at the dress shop (which he does NOT wear when we finally do see him as "plainclothes Martha".) The shop lady greeted Chester and Matthew and their story is they want to try on the dress so that they can buy it for Matthew's twin sister. The lady certainly finds it to be strange, but she buys their story and sets them up in the dressing room.

 

First off: Chester and Matthew bring along with them Martha's wig, socks, and shoes... why? Wouldn't it be WAY easier to just buy a few dresses based on his shape, take them home, and return anything that doesn't fit.

 

Secondly: The lady sees him come in as Matthew and for some ridiculous reason he leaves as Martha. Mind you they make it seem like he runs out the door embarrassed by the woman who thinks they're having sex in the dressing room- but they would have had to pay for that dress. They would have at least had to scan the tag on the dress he was wearing. What's funny to me is that might have actually been a funnier interaction than most of the crap that happened in the rest of the sequence.

 

Lastly: There was no reason for Matthew to be walking around as Martha that day at all - that is so risky and could only potentially raise more questions about who she is and why is she always hanging with Chester.

[Cameron H. 23786]

 

My understanding is all the players are objectively terrible. So, switching out players isn't going to make a huge difference. These girls seem to old to be at the age that everyone gets a chance to play though. So, I dont know.

 

Im just saying, in the two instances I’m thinking of (Pester and Kimberly) the players had just wiffed it pretty hard. The coach would be well within his right to bench them. Even if the girls on the bench are terrible too, they don’t deserve to be punished so Pester can learn a valuable lesson about self-confidence or some shit.

 

And the way it goes down just feels cruel.

 

Coach Chester: Okay, you’re going in.

Player: Awesome! I love soccer! It’s why I’m on this team after all.

Martha/Matthew: Oh, c’mon Pester, you want to keep playing, don’t you?

Pester: Yes.

Coach Chester: You’re terrible and my career depends on this, but why not? (to other player) Sit your ass back down.

Player: Oh, man...

[PollyDarton 1807]

Im just saying, in the two instances I’m thinking of (Pester and Kimberly) the players had just wiffed it pretty hard. The coach would be well within his right to bench them. Even if the girls on the bench are terrible too, they don’t deserve to be punished so Pester can learn a valuable lesson about self-confidence or some shit.

 

And the way it goes down just feels cruel.

 

Coach Chester: Okay, you’re going in.

Player: Awesome! I love soccer! It’s why I’m on this team after all.

Martha/Matthew: Oh, c’mon Pester, you want to keep playing, don’t you?

Pester: Yes.

Coach Chester: You’re terrible and my career depends on this, but why not? (to other player) Sit your ass back down.

Player: Oh, man...

 

I had the same thought, especially when they have the unnamed girl standing right there. Giving Pester another chance is ridiculous in the context of what Chester is trying to do. Plus... you take people in and out of soccer games all the time because they are running and need to occasionally rest.

[Cameron H. 23786]

I have a few things to say about this movie, but I'm at work so I'll talk about the thing that's easiest to quantify right now.

 

The entire sequence at the mall is completely arbitrary and does not need to exist (besides its potential for genitalia based comedy.)

 

 

Lastly: There was no reason for Matthew to be walking around as Martha that day at all - that is so risky and could only potentially raise more questions about who she is and why is she always hanging with Chester.

 

Ah! You beat me to it! That scene drove me crazy. It makes no sense!

 

The excuse seems to be he needs to learn to be more ladylike, but it’s ridiculous to test that in public in full regalia.

 

The only explanation I could come up with is that he ran out of the shop as Martha and they couldn’t reasonably find a place to change him back so they just kind of rolled with it.

 

I’m also concerned that Matthew seems to take to speed bags like a cat with a catnip ball. We get that you’re like this super sports guy, Matthew, but couldn't you just walk past the sporting goods store this one time?

[grudlian. 4725]

I have a few things to say about this movie, but I'm at work so I'll talk about the thing that's easiest to quantify right now.

 

The entire sequence at the mall is completely arbitrary and does not need to exist (besides its potential for genitalia based comedy.)

 

 

There really is no reason for "Martha" to ever dress like a girl outside of the ladybug's practice and games and neither of those situations calls for that fucking Laura Ashley nightmare that they try on at the dress shop (which he does NOT wear when we finally do see him as "plainclothes Martha".) The shop lady greeted Chester and Matthew and their story is they want to try on the dress so that they can buy it for Matthew's twin sister. The lady certainly finds it to be strange, but she buys their story and sets them up in the dressing room.

 

First off: Chester and Matthew bring along with them Martha's wig, socks, and shoes... why? Wouldn't it be WAY easier to just buy a few dresses based on his shape, take them home, and return anything that doesn't fit.

 

Secondly: The lady sees him come in as Matthew and for some ridiculous reason he leaves as Martha. Mind you they make it seem like he runs out the door embarrassed by the woman who thinks they're having sex in the dressing room- but they would have had to pay for that dress. They would have at least had to scan the tag on the dress he was wearing. What's funny to me is that might have actually been a funnier interaction than most of the crap that happened in the rest of the sequence.

 

Lastly: There was no reason for Matthew to be walking around as Martha that day at all - that is so risky and could only potentially raise more questions about who she is and why is she always hanging with Chester.

To add to this, why does Rodney Dangerfield give Matthew advice for turning down boys? Obviously, they wanted another homophobic joke, but how much time is he expecting Matthew to dress as Martha outside of soccer?

[PollyDarton 1807]

The only explanation I could come up with is that he ran out of the shop as Martha and they couldn’t reasonably find a place to change him back so they just kind of rolled with it.

 

 

Except... ya know... THE BATHROOM which he totally goes in.

[PollyDarton 1807]

Here's another easy to write one.

 

Please correct me if I'm wrong - but I think this is right: Every scene in this movie is during the day - not one night scene. Is this because of the underage actors? Rodney's bedtime? Either way, it's a little peculiar if you start thinking about it.

 

It is probably the nicest thing I can say about it... it's a very bright and sunny movie.

[Cameron H. 23786]

Here's another easy to write one.

 

Please correct me if I'm wrong - but I think this is right: Every scene in this movie is during the day - not one night scene. Is this because of the underage actors? Rodney's bedtime? Either way, it's a little peculiar if you start thinking about it.

 

It is probably the nicest thing I can say about it... it's a very bright and sunny movie.

 

It’s night when he gets kicked out of the bar for being a pedophile. But otherwise, very sunny.

[sycasey 2.0 2301]

1) Jason got so close to mentioning something that bothered me but didn't quite make it there: So at the last game in the movie, where the boss refuses to let his daughter play because he thinks she sucks, if that's the case then why are the parents even at the game? To watch everyone else play but their own kid? I know it may pale in comparison to so many other nonsense issues in the movie but that drove me crazy.

 

The whole thing doesn't track at all. This company pays for this girls' soccer team, seems very proud of it (to the extent that the boss displays all of the trophies in his office), and there is no direct reason given in the movie for why the Mullens do this. You'd think it's because their daughter loves soccer, but then we see that she seems to hate playing because she stinks at it. So then you think, "Maybe the parents are super-competitive go-getters and are pressuring their daughter into playing a sport." But then it turns out they know she stinks and are actively trying to keep her off the field! This whole subplot is just an endless loop.

 

[joel_rosenbaum 1269]

Just getting around to the episode today; one loose observation.

 

Did anyone else notice that Patton's first Dangerfield impression sounds a lot more like a Kennedy (i.e. a Boston accent) than Dangerfield's Queens accent? It's actually a fairly credible Boston accent, too. He switches it up later in the episode though.

[PollyDarton 1807]

 

It’s night when he gets kicked out of the bar for being a pedophile. But otherwise, very sunny. :)/>

 

Right! I forgot about that sequence because WTF!! The juxtaposing scenes of Chester at the bar and Matthew at the soda fountain is so bizarre. It’s another example of children acting in an inappropriately adult themed manner.

[Crummy Scrimmage 188]

 

The whole thing doesn't track at all. This company pays for this girls' soccer team, seems very proud of it (to the extent that the boss displays all of the trophies in his office), and there is no direct reason given in the movie for why the Mullens do this. You'd think it's because their daughter loves soccer, but then we see that she seems to hate playing because she stinks at it. So then you think, "Maybe the parents are super-competitive go-getters and are pressuring their daughter into playing a sport." But then it turns out they know she stinks and are actively trying to keep her off the field! This whole subplot is just an endless loop.

 

 

Also, as one of the older kids on a soccer team that her parents have sponsored and fervently championed for years, it's strange that this is her first season. Unless it took this long for her parents to finally pressure her into joining the team. But if they KNEW she sucked, why pressure her at all, especially if all they are interested in is winning?

 

I hate that I've spent my time thinking about all this.

[joel_rosenbaum 1269]

Paul is probably aware of this, given that he was (is?) a devoted Howard Stern listener. Dangerfield gave a revealing interview with Stern towards the end of his life. He mumbled a lot, and to my untrained ears seemed to be suffering from symptoms of dementia. The interview was ostensibly to promote Dangerfield's 2004 autobiography.

 

It's a heavy book and the interview is pretty heavy, too. Right off the bat, Stern jumps into the revelations that Dangerfield was (among other things) horrifically abused as a child. He also had a terrible relationship with his kids and a whole bunch of other sad life experiences. I just want to give y'all fair warning before you go ahead and listen to the interview. It's not an easy listen.

 

In any event, if the time cue doesn't work properly, the place to start is around 4:30 in the video.

 

https://youtu.be/2qZIlfDEo40?t=4m38s

[Cameron H. 23786]

Aside from all the obvious, I think one of the biggest problems with this movie is how it is constantly at war with itself. It's like they want Chester to be both likable and unlikable at the same time. This is most evident in the scene after Martha's first game where he berates Matthew for not being a team player. Chester is already cheating! The whole reason Martha is even a thing is so Matthew can do exactly what he's doing. What does Chester care if Martha is hogging the ball? He even scolds him because the other girls don't "like Martha very much." I'm sorry, but who the fuck cares? If the goal is "promotion" then this was the plan all along, wasn’t it? Why is this a surprise? When did "tricking little girls into thinking my girlfriend's son is a girl so they can become best friends with him" become an acceptable contingency plan? And if he actually cares about how the other girls' self-esteem - and their getting equal playing time - then he really shouldn't care when Matthew threatens to quit. But he does care. He cares very much.

 

So, which is it then, movie? Is he an inherently good man in a desperate situation doing the best he can, or is he an unscrupulous, Machiavellian slimeball willing to do whatever it takes to climb the corporate ladder? And because Chester occupies such a nebulous, ethical area, his character never experiences any real character growth. If anything, judging from the final scene, he might have actually become a worse person by the end!*

 

What's crazy is The Bad News Bears had already established a pretty successful template for this type of movie. I think it would worked better if they had established him as a straight up despicable person - kind of like what The Mighty Ducks ended up doing with Coach Bombay. This way, since the kids are obviously not the focus, we get a solid character arc for Chester. He shouldn't be imparting wisdom to these kids, they should be teaching him.

 

*For the record, Mr. Mullen says that he's going to promote Chester is to "Head of Sales" for the Ladybugs winning the Championship; however, in the final scene, Mr. Mullen refers to Chester as "Vice President!" Seriously, what kind of freaking company is that? Their promotion system seems to be so arbitrary that the whole company might as well be run by Caligula.

[sycasey 2.0 2301]

What's crazy is The Bad News Bears had already established a pretty successful template for this type of movie. I think it would worked better if they had established as a straight up despicable person - kind of like what The Mighty Ducks ended up doing with Coach Bombay. This way, since the kids are obviously not the focus, we get a solid character arc for Chester. He shouldn't be imparting wisdom to these kids, they should be teaching him.

 

On a screenwriting level, that's the most offensive thing here: that they couldn't even adequately execute the tired, predictable (but functional) Mighty Ducks formula.

[firsttimecallerlongtimelistenr 3590]

What other movie was done from 2017 besides Valerian and Fate of the Furious?

valerian doesn't count (if it's not on the list of episodes it's not on the spreadsheet). The 2017 movies are XXX3, Fast 8 & The Disaster Artist. I started reading the disaster artist at the weekend and so far it's hilarious. not sure if it would be as funny without hearing tommy's voice in my head as i read it though. greg captured him brilliantly.

[SeaSkunk 212]

I may be the only one, but one of the things about this movie that infuriated me was how they would keep objectively terrible players on the field instead of pulling someone from the bench.

 

Anyone know how many girls were actually on the team? It seemed like eleven, but then how did they bench the boss's daughter? I mean, when she was kicked out of the game, she went to sit on an empty bench.

[The_Triple_Lindy 2482]

Lastly: There was no reason for Matthew to be walking around as Martha that day at all - that is so risky and could only potentially raise more questions about who she is and why is she always hanging with Chester.

I’m also concerned that Matthew seems to take to speed bags like a cat with a cat nip ball. We get you’re like super sports guy, Matthew, but could you really not just walk past the sporting goods store this one time?

And how quickly does Martha give Chester the slip and find that gym? One second they're walking down the sidewalk talking to each other, and the next, he's giving a handspeed tutorial and Planet Fitness.

[docxen 3]

Fantastic episode!

 

Of course the skinny dipping scene is insane, but the craziest part has to be the fact that Matthew got naked himself! I mean, if his plan is to avoid the rest of the team until he can get a ride, why can't he do that fully clothed? It's not like the girls ripped the clothes off his back, and as far as I know, being naked doesn't help you hide better. The fact of the matter is, that little pervert made a choice.

 

Was he just like, "Fuck it. If Chesterfield doesn't get here in time, I'm going swimming and let the chips fall where they may..."

yea and you wonder did he watch the other girls strip down?