Episode 50 — BriTANicK, Our Close Friends

[mwn 5470]

Good evening Gil. Why don't kids build treehouses anymore? They're allways on their phones now? I hate it. Thank you.

[rod aug 5637]

Gil,

 

I've read on TMZ that you won't stop writing until you make a gillion dollars. How many numbers in a gillion?

[kobthatreal 5896]

Gil, when you pack a vest for your jimmy is it XXL or are you a 1 ruler kind of guy?

[DEATHMAN 3317]

Dear Gil,

 

The technology to filter the salt out of water exists and has existed for a long time, but there are still water shortages in some parts of the world. Why doesn't somebody just build a large scale water purifying factory and take a bunch of the water from the ocean and turn it into fresh water?

[markfromhighschool 10]

I will admit that I am getting a little comfortable in my role as the sound drop guy, but I know for a fact I am not replaceable.

 

AND, let it be known that in high school Sean would try to impress girls with his mediocre bird impressions but they would just laugh at him and walk away. I, however, was well known in high school for my impressive bird impressions and got laid pretty much every day because of it.

[DEATHMAN 3317]

Mark you push shopping carts into each other for a living and that isn't even a job so I'm sure you don't have a computer

[mwn 5470]

I think this is a www-trick from Engineer Cody and this isn't the real Mark from high school. There weren't any popcorn noises anywhere in the post. Telltale sign of a cyber-loser.

[ajzthisisdumb 857]

this was a pretty good episode for featuring two guys I had never heard of.

 

Hi Gil...I saw you as a Krav Maga guy on Happy Endings. What is the hardest you ever killed someone using martial arts?

[robinsbruce 4985]

Mark you push shopping carts into each other for a living and that isn't even a job so I'm sure you don't have a computer

 

*dumpsters. He pushes dumpsters into each other for a living. BIG difference.

[kobthatreal 5896]

I guess we know where Corpsefucker shops now!!!

[WEdidITagain 458]

hey scoop troop, couldn't give it a listen to this episode, was Cody boy finally flying straight? And who got the Pro-Version?

[Joe McGurl 8358]

Hey gang,

 

Saw someone puke on the counter at McDonald's while ordering at 5 am while in New York this weekend.

 

It was pretty baller.

[Matchgame72 118]

hey scoop troop, couldn't give it a listen to this episode, was Cody boy finally flying straight? And who got the Pro-Version?

 

While pretending to be a woman, he refused to be picked up by a man. What else is new?

[greggy 15909]

thank ye for answering me nick, i am still alive now because of you

 

brian thank u even more for coming on my podcast, i will think of an idea for one and then email you

 

mr ozeri, where is a good place to get popcorn?

[greggy 15909]

or how about this one,

mr ozeri, what is a fun thing to do at the mall?

[showshowbro 1177]

in my opinion, cody pacino'd when he really should have deniro'd

 

on a separate note, those two dudes are p clever, but their sketches are whack.

 

yet another reason that all of us need to step up our game.

 

i introduced this idea once during the RSS days but I really think it would be fun if S + H put on the Hollywood Handbook Short-Film Fiestaval

 

it would encourage us all to work on our sketches and take a break from the other sketches we do of big-titted models .

[Scooby Donkers 1514]

I'm sure I missed Gil but I was wondering if he's named after fish neck-slits and also isn't fish-slit a gross word?

 

In all seriousness, I like the idea of sharing creative stuff with you Handbook Heads. I know it's an idea you OG forum nerds have toyed with in the past.

 

I'm having trouble keeping up w the burgeoning forum activity lately. Just started a new job & also have been tryna do more comedys. I'm taking a neat class at iO in sketch writing, though it somehow embarrasses me to talk about it here, since I'm deeply insecure and I worry that the idea of "comedy classes" is inherently futile and lacks credibility. But for real, it's fun and good.

 

K, that's my unsolicited update. God knows I slog through enough of yours, you big nerds. I'll leave you w this: I'm v interested in the idea of bird "impressions," which clearly suggests a close mimicry of a single notable bird, possibly a celebrity, rather than a more generic bird call so is that interesting

[Scooby Donkers 1514]

PS g'night love u

[chanson 9697]

In all seriousness, I like the idea of sharing creative stuff with you Handbook Heads. I know it's an idea you OG forum nerds have toyed with in the past.

 

I'm gonna use your deference to make a point I've been wanting to make for some time. No one needs to defer to OG forum people when someone thinks something is a good idea or some shit. Just because some of us have been here way too fucking long doesn't mean this forum belongs more to us than anyone else. No one needs to apologize for coming to the Hollywood Handjobs Forum and fucking around. It may seem like a club where there's an in-group but, quite frankly, it's always good to see new people come onboard and contribute obsessively and unhealthily because it validates the odd community that has grown around this forum (and the podcast, I guess).

 

So that's my spiel.

 

PS - Congrats on the new job! Stick it to the man.

[Scooby Donkers 1514]

Thanks, C.

 

I expected nothing less on all counts. You're (we're) a welcoming bunch, if only for the validation you cite. Though I never felt you needed to, I think it's nice to say so explicitly sometimes l, esp w what seems to be boost in new-user forum activity. Does that represent a boost in listenership, too? Find out next time

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Except Joe McGurl

 

For really though, I'm starting an improv class at a nobody improv theater next Monday and I'm sups nervous about it :/

[greggy 15909]

look at all these new fish...i been posting on these eps since u heard your first marc maron kid....u think u got what it takes? u think u can get two qs on the popcorn gallry in 1 week? u think u can hang? well i got news for you....*leans in close and gets right in your face*

your right, pls be my best friend

[rod aug 5637]

 

I'm gonna use your deference to make a point I've been wanting to make for some time. No one needs to defer to OG forum people when someone thinks something is a good idea or some shit. Just because some of us have been here way too fucking long doesn't mean this forum belongs more to us than anyone else. No one needs to apologize for coming to the Hollywood Handjobs Forum and fucking around. It may seem like a club where there's an in-group but, quite frankly, it's always good to see new people come onboard and contribute obsessively and unhealthily because it validates the odd community that has grown around this forum (and the podcast, I guess).

 

So that's my spiel.

 

PS - Congrats on the new job! Stick it to the man.

I am extremely unhealthy and obsessive in real life with hamburger sandwiches so I'd like to thank all the (rod) OG forum members for welcoming me it is nice to think about handsome men like Sean and Hayes all of the time instead.

[chanson 9697]

I just wanted to spell it out somewhere because being a new person can be intimidating.

 

And also, we can use every voice we can get to complain about Sean and Hayes and how they never interact with us on the forums anymore ever since they got super famous and the AV Club started talking about them. I mean, what a bag of dicks. I bust my ass on this forum at least once or twice a day for maybe five minutes and that's the fucking thanks I get? Fuck off.

 

PS - I took an improv class in elementary school. It was a private school (the non-religious kind [so you know it's fancy and not some religious charity sort of deal]). Does that count as movies?

[WEdidITagain 458]

While pretending to be a woman, he refused to be picked up by a man. What else is new?