Jump to content
JulyDiaz

EPISODE 105 — Safe Haven

Recommended Posts

 

I have to take a little Delores Umbridge with this comment and with the take of our usually reliable hosts. Allow me to drop an SAT analogy on you:

 

Josh Duhamel:Timothy Olyphant

 

as

 

Stefan Urquel (the "cool" one):Denzel Washington

 

The gap between what Duhamel is trying to do and what Olyphant simply has by virtue of charisma and magnetism cannot be overstated.

 

I simply cannot abide Josh Duhamel's performance in this movie being called anything other than the acting equivalent of tapioca pudding. The only explanation for Paul and Jason's reaction to this movie is that Jason's illness caused some sort of Monkey Shines level brain interference/swapping while the pod was being recorded. Did a school bus filled with 10th grade girls pass by the studio at the exact moment the recording began?

 

 

Granted, I would have loved to see Raylan Givens show up in this idyllic North Carolina town and take down the evil husband...

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post

I normally tune into HDTGM to laugh, not cry.

 

I was far enough away from my computer to not be able to turn it off in time after paul said skip this if you don't want to be sad, didn't make it in time.

 

I feel like this sort of movie is ok if your in your teens or 20s and haven't really experienced any hardships, It reminds of ( I think it was Aukerman maybe Pardo? ) talking about how cancer jokes are funny until you become old enough to have your friends dying from it. For me it's the same thing with sad movies, it's like I just wanna laugh bros!

 

I also feel like from the podcast aside from one or two problems this movie was overall pretty good, not the type of movie you normally do.

 

This is the only HDTGM that I didn't enjoy; literally.

 

1 star.

Share this post


Link to post

Wait, did Paul say he watched the movie with June's sisters? I would love if they came on the mini-episode.

 

It'd be a Raphael-ypse

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post

So this movie kinda took place in the same space-time continuum of The Room, where time passes...I guess. Either its really quickly or really slowly. No idea how long the movie is supposed to be taking place over, but he is running what is basically the only store in town, does he not notice that she keeps coming in for more blonde hair dye? Not that it would matter, but I would maybe expect at least a throwaway scene thats like "oh, you dye your hair, how come?"

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post

So this movie kinda took place in the same space-time continuum of The Room, where time passes..

 

Speaking of The Room. One of those judge shows was on tv in the other room the other day, it may or may not of been judge joe brown, I am not really sure. I was cooking dinner in the other room and then I heard this guys voice saying "I did not hit her it's a lie your honor" I broke out into laughter. it wasn't Tommy Wiseau but boy he sure sounded the same.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post

CORRECTIONS:

 

The husband was able to make the photoshop image for the A.P.B poster so easily because he had the image of her from the bus station security camera. He knew to look for her as a blonde in the footage because if you notice him running around asking people if they had seen her at the station, the man who bumped into her in the beginning says, "Maybe as a blonde" or something along those lines.

 

Also, when the husband first is questioning the neighbor, he states that the woman he's looking for is new to the area. Explaining, albeit a stretch, why they don't recognize each other as neighbors?

 

OMISSION:

 

The lonesome buoy wasn't the only symbolism in this treasure of a film. If you recall, the door to the shop was always jammed in the beginning, as well as Dude's car door. Once the two let each other into their hearts, the sticking doors cease to be an issue in the film. That is until the husband finally tracks Girl down. When he goes to leave the shop after the little girl lies to him, the door once again gets stuck.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post

The Reason why the cop thinks she has short blonde hair is because in the bus

station when the cop is asking people have you seen this

girl and a man she maybe with short blonde hair. With the neighbor I think

she knows the cop hits her that's why the neighbor is mean to her

Share this post


Link to post

The Reason why the cop thinks she has short blonde hair is because in the bus

station when the cop is asking people have you seen this

girl and a man she maybe with short blonde hair.

CORRECTIONS:

 

The husband was able to make the photoshop image for the A.P.B poster so easily because he had the image of her from the bus station security camera. He knew to look for her as a blonde in the footage because if you notice him running around asking people if they had seen her at the station, the man who bumped into her in the beginning says, "Maybe as a blonde" or something along those lines.

 

 

To me, the real question is why does her husband have a readily available head/mugshot of his wife? When was that picture taken of her? Were they just goofing around one day and he was like, "Hey Honey, let me take a picture of you. No, don't smile or put on makeup. I just want you looking dead-eyed and austere."

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post

 

To me, the real question is why does her husband have a readily available head/mugshot of his wife? When was that picture taken of her? Were they just goofing around one day and he was like, "Hey Honey, let me take a picture of you. No, don't smile or put on makeup. I just want you looking dead-eyed and austere."

I don't get that either, but at least it wasn't like other movies where the picture that's being shown around is CLEARLY just a still from the movie. I think it was "Expendables 2" where at the end they're leaving some stuff for Liam Hemsworth's girlfriend or something, and the picture of him is clearly a posed shot from when they were in the forest that he was killed in that would have had to have been taken at a time where everyone was sneaking around and stuff.

giphy.gif

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post

A Bus from Boston to Atlanta would never pass through coastal North Carolina. I live a little up the coast from where this took place and we are NOWHERE near any major highway. I95 is the most likely route and that is almost three hours west.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post

Hey, the bus depot guy CLEARLY states that you can get "anywhere" from Atlanta. Things like "routes" and "roads" be damned!

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post

I fucking fell asleep an hour in. That's how insanely boring and sterile this movie is. The only thing that interested me even remotely is the house she buys, and then she PAINTS original hardwood flooring, sending me into insensible rage (at least I felt something for a brief moment). I've seen plenty of terrible romance movies on Hallmark/LifeTime that are at least more entertaining. The inciting incident leads to an hour of nothing. The development of the relationship was hamfisted. The detective was so detached in his relationship he doesn't have any idea of where she might have gone?

 

The only entertaining part was his vodka water bottle because he's so damn angry when he refills it and then stumbles around a parade chugging it/breathing in strangers faces.

 

0/5 extremely unsatisfied. I can't believe people even like this as a bad movie. There is nothing special, interesting, or even strange about it.

Share this post


Link to post

For anyone who missed this on Netflix and just can't resist, it's on USA right now. I guess that doesn't help since it started at 8:30 (unless you get the Pacific time zone feed), but you can still see the drunk husband's sweaty rampage and the ghost reveal.

Share this post


Link to post

Anybody else catch that moment where Eliza laughs (I think at a Zouks line) and it's a dead ringer for a June laugh?

I have to re-listen to find the moment, but I swore it sound like her for just that instant.

 

Great episode!

Share this post


Link to post

are other Nicholas Sparks movies this good? my girlfriend and i liked this movie a lot.

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×