greggy 15909 Posted October 11, 2015 I had to sue buzzfeed when they defamed me in their "1 Doctor Who Lost an Xbox Live Gold 12 Month Subscription Card Inside a Human Body" list. Also how is that a list when no one else has done it??? That site's so bad fucked up that buzzfeed puts it up as a negative thing. i think they should be celebrating you as guiness world record holder for being the surgeon who has implanted the most giftcards in patients...if you ever figure out which one has my arbys card in it i would appreciate getting it back tho ive had my own battles with the media, cracked featured me in an article called "You won't believe what this CRAZY DOCTOR prescribed to his patients!!" and its totally baseless, my license was revoked the whole time i was advising patients to drink pregnant lady urine so HELLO dont call me a crazy doctor, i was just giving advise as a layman 20 Share this post Link to post
chanson 9697 Posted October 11, 2015 I'm not here to make friends, I'm here to win. 5 Share this post Link to post
honlads 8798 Posted October 11, 2015 The digital age, greggy, my friend. The digital age. Seems you can't tell a man with gout to "gout of my clinic before I fucking suplex you" anymore without some butthurt fucker putting it on social media looking for notes on tumblr. 8 Share this post Link to post
Joe McGurl 8358 Posted October 11, 2015 Boy did I catch some heat when Mashable plastered me on their front page with the article, " This Doctor installed electrotherapy shock sensors to a coma patients bones to play a real life game of Operation." What was I supposed to do? It was a slow Tuesday and me and the boys in the OR decided to have a bit of fun and hey, the guy woke up from the coma halfway through but did I get any thanks for that? Unbelievable. 10 Share this post Link to post
lizzy 1946 Posted October 11, 2015 I thought Marcel was a monkey? wait, he's not a shell? also yeah hey guys i'm definitely never having fulfilling sex again, welcome to spinsterhood, who knew it would arrive while i was still in my 20s nb i'm also a little drunk but i AM pretty sure that marcel is a shell. he has shoes. 7 Share this post Link to post
elizamuffins 4228 Posted October 11, 2015 wait, he's not a shell? also yeah hey guys i'm definitely never having fulfilling sex again, welcome to spinsterhood, who knew it would arrive while i was still in my 20s nb i'm also a little drunk but i AM pretty sure that marcel is a shell. he has shoes. Life begins at 30! 4 Share this post Link to post
Andrew 4646 Posted October 11, 2015 Does anyone know if I left my sunglasses in the hotel from June? Edit: never mind, I'll come check myself, I need to be sure 5 Share this post Link to post
greggy 15909 Posted October 11, 2015 Boy did I catch some heat when Mashable plastered me on their front page with the article, " This Doctor installed electrotherapy shock sensors to a coma patients bones to play a real life game of Operation." What was I supposed to do? It was a slow Tuesday and me and the boys in the OR decided to have a bit of fun and hey, the guy woke up from the coma halfway through but did I get any thanks for that? Unbelievable. ive been saying it since my second residency, if you really want to make a guy wake up from a coma, just do what i did to my first malpractice claimant which i am not legally allowed to say 11 Share this post Link to post
Game of Scones 5812 Posted October 11, 2015 Life begins at 30! So, I can still be aborted? 8 Share this post Link to post
AshleyChupp 3958 Posted October 11, 2015 What band was it? I know a lot of people in bands that suck. These guys: https://www.facebook.com/absolutionkey A ton of my friends are involved in the Pittsburgh indie music scene, but I didn't know this band. They played well, but they were SO sleazy and the frontman literally hit on every girl at the bar, even the ones clearly there with partners. He kept touching us when he spoke and would carry his guitar around the bar with him and was just generally the hottest yet most repulsive person I've ever met. also yeah hey guys i'm definitely never having fulfilling sex again, welcome to spinsterhood, who knew it would arrive while i was still in my 20s Same, girl. I haven't gotten laid in six months, haven't gotten laid well in nine months and haven't gotten laid well by a dude in over a year. Probably just gonna invest in cloning myself purely for sexual purposes. 2 Share this post Link to post
honlads 8798 Posted October 11, 2015 "Exposure exposure exposure" is what I say to myself when I'm reading yet another Gawker thinkpiece on whether or not I should be fired for prescribing a "chill pill" no matter what the ailment. 14 Share this post Link to post
Andrew 4646 Posted October 11, 2015 I'm kind of a Patch Adams type so I'll often write a prescription for a listicle. 11 Share this post Link to post
elizamuffins 4228 Posted October 11, 2015 So, I can still be aborted? Your mother brought you into this world and she can take you out of it. Or she can let you live so you can date rape an absurd amount of women. Up to her. If you get that ref you are either over 30 or very into the old albums of a shamed former king of comedy. 6 Share this post Link to post
Dads for Butt Stuff 753 Posted October 11, 2015 Your mother brought you into this world and she can take you out of it. Or she can let you live so you can date rape an absurd amount of women. Up to her. If you get that ref you are either over 30 or very into the old albums of a shamed former king of comedy. If you get this reference your childhood was awesome 2 Share this post Link to post
Game of Scones 5812 Posted October 11, 2015 Or she can let you live so you can date rape an absurd amount of women. Up to her. I know I'm a forum villian, but holy fuck! 6 Share this post Link to post
chanson 9697 Posted October 11, 2015 I don't get the reference, but I'm the men's rights activist around here, not Norm. So, Norm, kindly BACK THE FUCK OFF. 6 Share this post Link to post
Dads for Butt Stuff 753 Posted October 11, 2015 it's a cosby ref right?* *sorry if the not getting the reference is a reference I don't get 2 Share this post Link to post
chanson 9697 Posted October 11, 2015 *sorry if the not getting the reference is a reference I don't get Is this a reference I'm not getting?.. to you not getting a reference to not getting a reference, I mean. Just making sure. 4 Share this post Link to post
Dads for Butt Stuff 753 Posted October 11, 2015 Is this a reference I'm not getting?.. to you not getting a reference to not getting a reference, I mean. Just making sure. If I remember correctly I'm referencing Rashomon 6 Share this post Link to post
chanson 9697 Posted October 11, 2015 If I remember correctly I'm referencing Rashomon Oh, no I knew you were making a reference. I was making a different reference. 1 Share this post Link to post
Dads for Butt Stuff 753 Posted October 11, 2015 Oh, no I knew you were making a reference. I was making a different reference. I think we're talking at cross-references then* *Tie Xi Qu: West of the Tracks (2002) 3 Share this post Link to post
JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724 Posted October 12, 2015 Wait, Norm is a forum villain? What kind of role do I play here? Oh right, The funny one. 8 Share this post Link to post
souprman 10477 Posted October 12, 2015 Life begins at 30! Liz I'm sorry to tell you it promptly ends at 39 years 11 months 30 days 23 hours 59 minutes and 59 seconds. But I assure you you'll be over it by then so nbd. 2 Share this post Link to post
souprman 10477 Posted October 12, 2015 I'm not here to make friends, I'm here to win. I can already see the "Don't blame me I voted for Chanson" bumperstickers. 10 Share this post Link to post