Episode 133 - The Quest

[JulyDiaz 2797]

Imagine Bloodsport but a much watered down version that takes place in the past and is not that good. High and Mighty podcast host and JCVD aficionado Jon Gabrus joins Paul, June, and Jason in studio to discuss Jean Claude Van Damme's directorial debut The Quest. They'll cover everything including Old Man Van Damme, French clown Van Damme, the blimp, and the children street gang. Don’t forget to check out Blake Harris’ Oral History of The Quest over at www.slashfilm.com! Get yourself a BB-8 “What Is Its Mission?” T-shirt or Tote Bag over at http://howdidthisgetmade.bigcartel.com/ Set your DVRs for Party Over Here, a new FOX sketch comedy show from The Lonely Island and Paul starring Nicole Byer, Jessica McKenna, and Alison Rich. It airs Saturdays at 11 pm. People of the internet: Watch Paul in Fresh off the Boat on ABC. Awhile ago, Paul and Rob Huebel did a comedy special on a 60 foot glass bus that traveled around LA. Now you’ll be able to see it. Go to https://itun.es/us/3M4J9 now to buy it! You can also see Jason in Transparent on Amazon! Also, check out June in Grace and Frankie available on Netflix, and in all the episodes of NTSF:SD:SUV:: on HULU for free, and Jason in The Dictator (he’s still in it!).

[Elektra Boogaloo 3371]

It is like 6 am and I woke up with joint pain. Saw there was a new episode with a guest I was unfamiliar with and thought, "huh, lemme just see who this guy is and then I will listen when I am fully awake."

 

Now I am like twenty minutes in; I should be back asleep for those last few precious moments before work. Instead I wanted to come to this forum to ask Cody, the (almost) hero of last week's show to please, please come back and show June the splits. You can be our hero again!! Second chances are REAL.

 

Also if Paul is Groot, I think Jason must be Rocket. I'll leave it up to the rest of you to decide the rest (Gamora seems the obvious choice for June since she's the only lady. But I think you could make an argument for her being Drax or Starlord.)

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

From this to his appearances on Comedy Bang Bang to the AMAZING Earwolf Presents episode "Musical Theater with Andrew Lloyd Webber," Jon Gabrus has been a real heavy (and by "heavy" I mean "perilously thin") hitter of comedy podcasts. He shows up and makes everything around him better than you ever thought possible. I haven't even listened to this yet and I am EXCITED.

[ChunkStyle 1160]

Come November I am writing in Episode 133 of HDTGM as my choice for President.

 

I thought JCVD giving up the golden dragon made this a perfect story for a Frank Dux type bullshit artist. "Yes, I did win the greatest fighting tournament in the world BUT I can't show you the proof of that because I gave up the prize to save the lives of my idiot friends/slavers."

[FisterRoboto 7499]

I say this every time she comes back after being out for a while, but goddamn it, I missed June. From the first minute, she's so wonderful in this episode.

[Timbosteron 73]

I think the reporter played quite an important role: after she was on the phone and received the telegraphed message the movie cuts to Moore explaining JCVD that he can only be part of the tournament if he has an invitation. At that moment she enters and says she has the solution and we see them waiting at the station for Maxie. So I think she got telegraphed the news that Maxie will fight in the tournament and so it is practically her idea to use him to get into the tournament.

But I do have some questions:

- Why is she allowed to take pictures at that “secret” tournament?

- Are we supposed to believe that the tournament is so secret, that the only way to be part of it is by invitation? And the map on it shows the way? Then no one will ever find the place, because the map shows nothing. There are mountains, two lakes, some roads and the name of an area called “Shan”, but nothing like a big X or an arrow saying “Go here”. No one will ever find this tournament.

- At the beginning the mobster looks out of the window and the kid can steal the bag with the money. But he only goes to the window because Dubois is beating up the policemen. So, what was the plan here? Without the police showing up it would have never been worked.

 

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

I just started listening, and I'm already laughing... I really needed this today... I've been having a very terrible time the past few days. I'm not gonna be the one who brings this thread down, so I'll just say it involves the hospital and a parent.

[taylor anne photo 11311]

I just started listening, and I'm already laughing... I really needed this today... I've been having a very terrible time the past few days. I'm not gonna be the one who brings this thread down, so I'll just say it involves the hospital and a parent.

I promise I'm not liking the fact that your week has been terrible, just sympathizing. I'm so sorry you're going through that.

 

I also seriously needed this as I've been having a real shitty couple of weeks, but mine is just cause my boyfriend is a total asshole and I'm breaking up with him. -__-

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

The question about dudes doing splits, and being a lady myself, I really don't mind it. I do get a tiny bit of the cringies (because balls) but I have no problem with it. Buns... Okay, so, I was born in the mid 80's, and I was always interested in stuff my parents were interested in, so I watched a lot of stuff from the 70's and 80's (If you want to watch a dayglow scary-happy bubbly kid's movie vomit train puppet shit show, look up 'the hugga bunch movie' it's in full on youtube) So a lot of my formative years, developing a sense of what I found attractive, were spent seeing man buns (Which I love, I also am kinda into the current trend of full frontal male nudity too) and leading men who were either hairless and super-jacked, or fairly fit, hairy, bearded/mustachioed, suave guys. I was also the "Don't tell me what to like!" kind of kid, so while a lot of my girl friends in elementary/midle school were fawning over JCVD, Brad Pitt, JTT, Leo Decaprio etc. I was always like "Ew gross barf." So hairless huge/super buff dudes were never my thing.

 

 

Also, Way to make my 100th post. I'm happy with this.

[pepperjack 303]

Team inflexible! I've never touched my toes ever. Woohoo.

[FaceLikeThunder 2114]

This episode and the last brought so much nostalgia for me

[Elektra Boogaloo 3371]

I need to listen to this one again but did anyone else laugh when Jadon talked about how he's going to put together a team of clowns and street performers? It made me think of his fear of "The Clowns" who drove around in vans. We all know clowns are scary in general but now with them kicking you in the face and like walking on stilts?

 

Here's my pitch: Highly trained ninja clowns who get in vans one night a year and kill street urchins. Jean Claude Van Damme has to come out of street urchin/clown retirement and punch them all in the nuts.

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

I need to listen to this one again but did anyone else laugh when Jadon talked about how he's going to put together a team of clowns and street performers? It made me think of his fear of "The Clowns" who drove around in vans. We all know clowns are scary in general but now with them kicking you in the face and like walking on stilts?

 

Here's my pitch: Highly trained ninja clowns who get in vans one night a year and kill street urchins. Jean Claude Van Damme has to come out of street urchin/clown retirement and punch them all in the nuts.

 

That would make a fantastic "The Purge" sequel (Or parody) and would be the only one of those movies I'd ever see.

[JordanHall 44]

I'm pro man splits and rumps for sure

[Cameron H. 23786]

I just started listening, and I'm already laughing... I really needed this today... I've been having a very terrible time the past few days. I'm not gonna be the one who brings this thread down, so I'll just say it involves the hospital and a parent.

I promise I'm not liking the fact that your week has been terrible, just sympathizing. I'm so sorry you're going through that.

 

I also seriously needed this as I've been having a real shitty couple of weeks, but mine is just cause my boyfriend is a total asshole and I'm breaking up with him. -__-

 

Count me as number three for having a terrible past few weeks. I won't get into it here, but if either of you need an anonymous, judgement-free ear to vent to, feel free to PM me. I sincerely hope everything works out for you both.

 

As Amy said, I'm very grateful that I have HDTGM here to take me out of the muck and mire if only for an hour or so. Thank you, Paul, June, and Jason!

[Cameron H. 23786]

Jason, I'm here to call you out, bro!

 

What are we doing: fucking or fighting?

 

[AstronautDown 282]

Final fight scene is obviously JCVD's homage to this classic scene from The Secret of Monkey Island!

 

Loved this and the Bloodsport episode and loved watching these movies, although, I wish we could have a follow up discussion about what exactly is a street fighter...

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

Jason, I'm here to call you out, bro!

 

What are we doing: fucking or fighting?

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hiUuL5uTKc

 

 

[ChunkStyle 1160]

Maxie was the clear MVP of this movie for me. He had an amazingly adventurous spirit that I believe was built on a foundation of not having the mental capacity to visualize any negative future outcome.

[taylor anne photo 11311]

 

Count me as number three for having a terrible past few weeks. I won't get into it here, but if either of you need an anonymous, judgement-free ear to vent to, feel free to PM me. I sincerely hope everything works out for you both.

 

As Amy said, I'm very grateful that I have HDTGM here to take me out of the muck and mire if only for an hour or so. Thank you, Paul, June, and Jason!

You're too kind, sir!

 

[Cameron H. 23786]

I have to admit, this may have been one of the most magical movies HDTGM has ever done. It simply defies any logical explanation.

 

For instance, Dubois must have certainly been a grand illusionist indeed to be able to elude about sixty police officers by jumping on to the single piece of cargo being loaded (noisily) in the middle of the night on an otherwise quiet and deserted dock; flail and kick like a maniac as he passes twenty feet overhead; and not have a single person look up with even the slightest bit of curiosity Even if they weren't expecting him to be dangling like an spaz from beneath it, you'd think someone would take a passing glance at it, as it is-- as I've said--both noisy and wildly conspicuous.

 

Or how about how Carrie Newton uses her uncanny thaumaturgical powers to make a phone call from Thailand to New York City, on an old timey phone in 1925, when, as everybody knows, the first transatlantic call wasn't possible until 1926, and even then, only from New York to London. I mean, everyone knows that, right? Right?

[Cameron H. 23786]

I'm just going to throw this out there...

 

Why...was he going to a bar to get a cup of coffee?

[ChunkStyle 1160]

 

Or how about how Carrie Newton uses her uncanny thaumaturgical powers to make a phone call from Thailand to New York City, on an old timey phone in 1925, when, as everybody knows, the first transatlantic call wasn't possible until 1926, and even then, only from New York to London. I mean, everyone knows that, right? Right?

 

Yeah but conservatively they could have been well into 1926 then.

[taylor anne photo 11311]

The blimp thing does oddly resemble Superman II, but it definitely made me think of another HDTGM favorite starring Roger Moore.

 

A View To a Kill!

 

Best blimp scene ever in my opinion, and to me it shows that JCVD wanted to elbow Roger and go, "Hey remember when you fought Christopher Walken on a blimp and went to the top of the Golden Gate Bridge? Yeah that was awesome."

[Cameron H. 23786]

The thing that bother's me about the blimp was...what was Dobbs' plan if there wasn't a blimp there? How could he have known that was going to be there? Like the baby in Junior, there didn't seem to be any kind of exit strategy.

 

However, this also brings to mind another strange flaw in Dobbs' plan. At one point he tells DuBois to lose his next match on purpose because he is going to need him to "be strong" so they can steal the Golden Dragon, but in order to for DuBois to convincingly "take a dive," doesn't that mean he would have to take a beating against one of the most dangerous men in the world first? Since it seems like he needs DuBois' muscles to pull off the heist, what does it matter if he takes a beating and takes a dive or if he takes a beating and legitimately loses. Either way, DuBois is going to be pretty fucked up when the whole steal the giant golden statue plan gets underway.