Episode 83 — Winter's Tale

[robinsbruce 4985]

Delurking to just say that occasionally forgetting I've installed the Chrome "cloud-to-butt" extension amuses me to no end.

 

Also +1 on the Zouks/Daly "we've never done a podcast together" bit; every CBB listener was probably trembling with excitement when they saw the guest for this week's HDTGM episode. One of the greatest moments in Earwolf history is Andy Daly's cavalcade of suicide on CBB #148:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuEEAbrR4Dc

 

"He was my best friend... well, some of his characters were."

 

Hell yes, and hello C&B. I hath missed you in your absence.

 

I'm really glad I didn't go to see this feelum in the theater, it seems like a huge steamy dog-loaf. This episode is amazing even if you haven't seen the movie. I haven't heard a full-on Zouks meltdown like that since Battlefield Earth.

[DanEngler 5249]

Delurking to just say that occasionally forgetting I've installed the Chrome "cloud-to-butt" extension amuses me to no end.

Welcome back! I was starting to wonder whether you were dead, or if you and Shariq were involved some sort of murder-suicide pact.

[PhillipMedoc 648]

Hell yes, and hello C&B. I hath missed you in your absence.

 

I'm really glad I didn't go to see this feelum in the theater, it seems like a huge steamy dog-loaf. This episode is amazing even if you haven't seen the movie. I haven't heard a full-on Zouks meltdown like that since Battlefield Earth.

Hiya Broose. I was out of commish for a while there.

 

No way in hell was I watching this garbage, even a torrented cam version with Russian subtitles. From the episode, it sounds like a typical Hollywood fuckbotch of what I totally believe is a great novel -- it's not like that doesn't happen all the time. Like they got the rights to the book, realized it was impossible to film, handed it to a hack (the guy who wrote the Dan Brown movies and the shitty Schumacher Batman sequels, which actually Winter's Tale sounds like a terrible mash-up of) and he went "Sure thing, it's gonna be like Isabel Allende wrote Highlander." And the specific idea of adding in Will Smith (who I'm assuming was the only prominent person of color in this movie) as The Devil just sounds like some seriously lazy ass shit.

 

EarBear and others did a pretty good explanation of the what and how of magic realism; if you'd like to see a classic example of that, check out the aforementioned Like Water For Chocolate or, even better, Crna Macka Beli Macor aka Black Cat, White Cat (which is also one of the greatest films you've never seen). It's a much more prevalent device (really it was a pretty specific movement) in literature than cinema and has a fairly rich history in that medium. There's certainly an argument to be made for some films being magic realist or having elements of such (like say, Wes Anderson), but I would attribute that more to the pervasiveness of irony and post-modernism in contemporary culture.

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

OK, so how's THIS for being absolutely terrible human beings...

 

At the theater that I've been working at for forever, there's this group that comes in that's made up of mentally handicapped adults, accompanied by a couple of chaperones. They're all paid for separately, but it was decided a long time ago that the chaperones get in for free. We get bitched at for our pass percentages a lot, and when it comes to ways to reduce it, to cut back on who gets passes, we always suggest eliminating pass privileges for THESE people, because there's definitely something fishy going on with the chaperones, but we get shot down every time, because blah blah showing the community we care blah blah whatever.

 

Anyway, this doesn't happen all the time, as it's not always the same people accompanying the group, but when it's these two middle-aged women in particular, it gets really fucking stupid, because they seem to basically use the group as a way of seeing the movies that THEY want to see while not having to pay for it, whether its going to benefit the group at all. I remember way back when, there was a time when "Spider-Man", "Star Wars Episode II", and maybe a Disney movie like "Lilo and Stitch" were all out at the same time. You would think that any of these movies might offer something to someone with limited mental capabilities, like at least there's a lot of action, shiny objects, and visually interesting stuff, right? Fuck that, the ladies ended up taking them to "Life or Something Like It" or whatever Angelina Jolie movie was out that's aimed squarely at our moms.

 

Fast forward to last week, and you can probably see where this is going. The group comes in, accompanied by these old broads again, OK? Well, we've got some pretty good options right now for kids that would be great for these guys, specifically "LEGO Movie" and "Frozen", or at even less kiddy stuff that at least has crazy special effects like "Robocop" or "Pompeii", but what do these bitches haul the group to? "Winter's Fucking Tale". Just like the HDTGM crew, I've heard from other adults that are of able mind and body that they didn't know what the fuck was going on in this movie, and these fucking bitches hauled a half a dozen unsuspecting handicapped people along with them just so they didn't have to pay to see it. I'm like 99.999999999% sure that it wasn't even put to a vote. So yeah, fuuuuuuuuuuuck those ladies...

[RobertCraigAshby 1]

I couldn't bring myself to pay to see Winter's Tale it looked too shitty to spend money on........ so I have a belated error/omission from Glimmerman. I watched it because I hadn't seen it and it's one of my favorite HDTGM episodes. The Italian restaurant was a real restaurant in my opinion. However to keep the CIA head bad guy's meeting with the Senator top secret, I believe the CIA dude had his henchmen impersonate the door man, security, wait staff etc. The CIA dude had the regular door man, security, wait staff get the hell out before the senator showed ( I guy he was dirt on whoever owns the place). It's why the phone guy at the drop dropped the accent when talking with Seagal, I assume Seagal has history with the whole crew of the bad guys working for the main CIA guy. I believe this is why Segal was so quick to fight these guys, he knew they were all ex CIA assasins working with the ex CIA main badguy. The confusion about this is due to the stupid phone comment button they put on the end of the scene, which makes it sound like the impersonating henchman of the ex CIa guy really works at the restaurant. They should have used something like "I didn't become a spy for this shit..." and the phone henchman haning up while holding his bloody nose or something.

[RyanSz 3140]

OK, so how's THIS for being absolutely terrible human beings...

 

At the theater that I've been working at for forever, there's this group that comes in that's made up of mentally handicapped adults, accompanied by a couple of chaperones. They're all paid for separately, but it was decided a long time ago that the chaperones get in for free. We get bitched at for our pass percentages a lot, and when it comes to ways to reduce it, to cut back on who gets passes, we always suggest eliminating pass privileges for THESE people, because there's definitely something fishy going on with the chaperones, but we get shot down every time, because blah blah showing the community we care blah blah whatever.

 

Anyway, this doesn't happen all the time, as it's not always the same people accompanying the group, but when it's these two middle-aged women in particular, it gets really fucking stupid, because they seem to basically use the group as a way of seeing the movies that THEY want to see while not having to pay for it, whether its going to benefit the group at all. I remember way back when, there was a time when "Spider-Man", "Star Wars Episode II", and maybe a Disney movie like "Lilo and Stitch" were all out at the same time. You would think that any of these movies might offer something to someone with limited mental capabilities, like at least there's a lot of action, shiny objects, and visually interesting stuff, right? Fuck that, the ladies ended up taking them to "Life or Something Like It" or whatever Angelina Jolie movie was out that's aimed squarely at our moms.

 

Fast forward to last week, and you can probably see where this is going. The group comes in, accompanied by these old broads again, OK? Well, we've got some pretty good options right now for kids that would be great for these guys, specifically "LEGO Movie" and "Frozen", or at even less kiddy stuff that at least has crazy special effects like "Robocop" or "Pompeii", but what do these bitches haul the group to? "Winter's Fucking Tale". Just like the HDTGM crew, I've heard from other adults that are of able mind and body that they didn't know what the fuck was going on in this movie, and these fucking bitches hauled a half a dozen unsuspecting handicapped people along with them just so they didn't have to pay to see it. I'm like 99.999999999% sure that it wasn't even put to a vote. So yeah, fuuuuuuuuuuuck those ladies...

 

I'm going to admit, the shiny objects line got me, so I will be joining you in that special place in hell I guess.

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

I've seen that phenomenon a couple times, actually. There was one instance where I was seeing some pure trash action film (probably Olympus Has White House Down or whatever) and a group of severely handicapped adults, accompanied by a chaperone, were in the theater as well. They were handicapped enough to be obviously disturbed by the images, violence, and noise on screen, to the point where they were constantly vocalizing their distress, only to be yelled at by their own chaperone. It was clear they did not want to be their and it was pretty disheartening to see.

 

People are scum, I guess.

[MondayCity 194]

Hey, I've been unable to contribute to this discussion because I'm still reading. I bought the book on my phone and didn't realize that it was 5,000 pages long until I wandered into a "bricks and mortar" this weekend and saw the heft of the book in the real world. I mean, if Verne Troyer stood on this tome, he could play eye-to-eye scenes with Brigitte Nielsen. Hey, I've got a full time job, and I'm not an insomniac, so I'm going to miss the game this time. Also, the magic realism includes the fact that someone seems to be adding hundreds of pages of text everytime I put the book down. Still glad I'm reading it, but if someone doesn't reunite the thief and that pianist chick by the denouement--I don't care what century it's in--there's going to be hell to pay. Consider that, Helprin, as your goblins keep adding plot when I'm not reading.

[jarrycanada 2483]

Two things are clear to me now after listening to this podcast, they need to review more movie trailers in the future. maybe the mini podcast could have paul and the gang review movie trailers that they have seen. I'd reather hear that then hear paul read pointless comments for 5 mins.

 

also the second thing is clear to me that this podcast isn't as good with out june. She was missed.

[EarBear 460]

Two things are clear to me now after listening to this podcast, they need to review more movie trailers in the future. maybe the mini podcast could have paul and the gang review movie trailers that they have seen.

 

I've been saying this for awhile. Trailer reviews would be a great addition to minisodes.

[Wien 401]

Trailers usually arent as fucking ludicrous as Blended's, though. So it just depends.

[RoyCorder 48]

so maybe I missed something; but why exactly do angels and demons care if someone performs a miracle or not?

 

I don't remember ever hearing anyone say what the heck was at stake. "if he performs his miracle it's a win for the other side". how?

[RoyCorder 48]

also, what's so great about becoming a star?

[katy4650 49]

Two things. How sad is it that Akiva Goldsmith says he made this movie in memory of his late wife - I bet she's ecstatic with the result.

Also, that this was part of the reason why Russell Crowe is getting divorced. His wife stuck in Australia because their sons go to school there got fed up with Rusty doing back-to-back-to-back movies and never spending any time with his family. This movie was totally not worth it.

[jarrycanada 2483]

Winters tale action cups

 

[firsttimecallerlongtimelistenr 3590]

crowe was in ireland over the weekend promoting noah. he was asked if he was happy with his irish accent in this film. he said he couldnt answer the question because he has never seen the movie .. it was rushed out so fast he never got to see it ... kinda like not looking out the window so you never see the dirt and have to clean it

[IHugKittens 53]

Okay, so I finally saw this load of shit.

Recently some guy where I work somehow contracted tuberculosis from somewhere. So mass panic began and every single employee of the company, about, I dunno a 1000 people was forced to go through a medical test for tuberculosis and it was done in order to prevent a potential outbreak because they said it's highly contagious. So I kept thinking about that incident during the whole movie , the girl saying over and over again how it's not contagious, then having sex with Collin Farrell and I kept thinking wow, this is sooooooo full of shit.

[dlo burns 129]

Okay, so I finally saw this load of shit.

Recently some guy where I work somehow contracted tuberculosis from somewhere. So mass panic began and every single employee of the company, about, I dunno a 1000 people was forced to go through a medical test for tuberculosis and it was done in order to prevent a potential outbreak because they said it's highly contagious. So I kept thinking about that incident during the whole movie , the girl saying over and over again how it's not contagious, then having sex with Collin Farrell and I kept thinking wow, this is sooooooo full of shit.

 

Did the test include a hot dicking?

[freeagent 329]

I still want June to see this. She needs to do a mini episode ala zardoz.

[CommentsFromMyPocket 53]

If everybody is special then why is every child with cancer not saved by an orphaned European angel(?) riding their spirit animal?

 

Fuck this movie.

[DanSpengler 0]

Okay, so I finally saw this load of shit.

Recently some guy where I work somehow contracted tuberculosis from somewhere. So mass panic began and every single employee of the company, about, I dunno a 1000 people was forced to go through a medical test for tuberculosis and it was done in order to prevent a potential outbreak because they said it's highly contagious. So I kept thinking about that incident during the whole movie , the girl saying over and over again how it's not contagious, then having sex with Collin Farrell and I kept thinking wow, this is sooooooo full of shit.

 

Have not seen the movie, but just listened to the episode. Not sure if this is period-correct as they may not have understood bacteria well enough at the time the story was set, but tuberculosis (like a lot of diseases) has a window of contagion. TB has to be active to be contagious. I know modern medicine limits the contagious period to a few weeks, and that TB can relapse if not aggressively treated, but I think the infection can go into remission naturally as well. There are a lot of ways this could be bungled in a period piece, but it's not outright bonkers for her to say that she's not contagious.