Episode 324 — Golden Duchess Cruise Lines

[laurajam 9]

Something doesn't have to be sexual to be sexist, 'cute' is demeaning, the very fact that you say it to a five year old might give you a clue on that. I don't like saying it to five year old girls anyway.

[freeagent 329]

 

I'd buy an "Engineer Cody Cody is a National Treasure" t-shirt.

 

his head on the National Treasure movie poster

[DanEngler 5249]

I guarantee there's no one here that's just ignoring the show looking at the pictures and being like "that chick is fucking hot I want to bang her, let me go post about it on the board"

Actual real quotes I have removed from the Earwolf forums include:

• "Should I feel bad for wanting to fuck [female guest]??"
  
• "[female guest] has nice gazongas. C+ ep."
  
• "HOLY JUGGS"
  
• "wow would you check out the schnozz on that broad"
  
• and much more, but that would require more than five clicks into the moderation log.
  

 

While the near-constant "cute" remarks may seem benign in the abstract, they are but the tip of an iceberg that most of you never see. We take a very light approach to moderation in this community—you'll notice that shitty and banal discussions are typically left alone unless they stray into personal attacks—but nothing could be less relevant to the discussion of an audio podcast than the physical appearance of the guests.

 

I will continue to delete gross male gaze-y remarks until the people making them either learn to respect the performers or need to be shown the door. If you disagree with that policy, I suggest filing a formal grievance with my supervisor.

[SexAstronaut 36]

I have to say in terms of how male members regard women on an internet msg/comment board, this is one of the most respectful places on the internet I've come across. Do you know how rare that it is on the internet? It's like happening upon a U2 song that doesn't make you want to put knitting needles down your ear canals.

[CameronMascari 329]

This comment section really went to hell... but... uh... Great episode!

[jughead 189]

taking a snake break.....don don don da......taking a snake break.........

[xoValeriexo 4369]

I think there are a lot of comments about crushin' on female guests because mostly straight guys post here. I don't know how many 'likes' I'd get if I decided to start talking about all my earwolf crushes, but I'll do it anyway.

 

Wengert. Gemberling. Chad Carter. Jon Glaser. Wittels. Conroy. PFT. Mantzoukas. Dunnigan. And like 100+ others.

 

And, you know what, I'm not afraid to say that I find them all to be cuties with booties.

 

With that said, obviously get rid of all "JUGGS" posts (unless they're coming from me, because ya know mama likes those juggs).

[mikebonetti 3718]

If calling someone cute is controversial, then I don't want to be protroversial.

[LessfunnySuits 181]

Fun ep, awful thread.

[KajusX 1807]

I'm starting this thread over.

 

"YES! GREAT QUESTION!!" -Scott, super-stoked about his (admittedly) great question

[DanEngler 5249]

CORRECTIONS & OMISSIONS: Scott referred to Cody as "Donk", but "Donk" was actually Engineer Cody Brett from the CBB 5th Anniversary Show.

[Mr. Reeses Pieces 163]

 

You aren't posting how cute you find Jon Gabrus or PFT.

Anyone here who is not vocal about feeling a deep, even feral attraction to the way Paul F. Tompkins wears a pinstripe suit has lost their vocal cords.

[Mr. Reeses Pieces 163]

My delight at Engineer Cody Cody's opening gaffe was dampened only by the knowledge that it wasn't the Hollywood Facts theme that almost started playing.

I rewound it to see if it was the Hollywood Facts.

[Darbler Cheesegarbler 1110]

I finished the episode since my last post, and this is another one for the record books. 2015 is off to an insane start! The Tears for Fears episode was one of my favorites of all-time, and this one was all around great too. I honestly can't believe that somebody made a forum topic about how Scott has been unfunny lately, because I think it's the exact opposite: Scott just seems more on his game than ever. I think he's leaning more into the love it or hate it kind of character, but I could be wrong... I just feel like if you love his shtick, he's delivering more than ever, and if you don't like that kind of thing, then (taking a note from Scott on how he treats new listeners who don't like his intros): go fuck yourself.

 

Has anyone from LA seen Wild Horses live, and if so, can you tell us about your experience? They seem like an improv group that would be amazing to see. The only thing I've seen of Stephanie Allynne away from Earwolf was her role in that amazing UCB Master Class thing on YouTube, but she strikes me as insanely funny and genuine, in much the same way that Lauren does. I think all four of them are amazing, but those two just kill me. I'm too lazy to grab a link right now, which says alot about how pathetic I am because it's just a few clicks, but I really recommend watching the UCB Master Class stuff. Matt Besser is so perfect playing a version of himself as a teacher, I'm surprised videos like these aren't more of a thing. Paul Rust is also one of the best parts of those videos, his "character" is so fucking amazing, really worth watching for any Earwolf fan.

 

Back to this episode: rambling insanity may sound like it has negative connotations, but I don't mean it that way at all. This episode became rambling insanity, "heavy saturation" I guess is what Scott and others call it, but it was right in the zone that I like my CBB to be in. Definitely a C+, and also I don't know if any of the Cody stuff is a bit (I doubt it is at all), but man it's so funny. Brett, and now Cody, have really become a part of why I love Earwolf podcasts.

[Darbler Cheesegarbler 1110]

Anyone here who is not vocal about feeling a deep, even feral attraction to the way Paul F. Tompkins wears a pinstripe suit has lost their vocal cords.

 

Sorry for the double post, but yeah... As a heterosexual male, I have to say, I do find Lauren very cute (on many more levels than her physical appearance) but I think I've commented more on Paul F. Tompkins' appearance than anyone else's. The man is dapper and handsome, a great sense of style, and he eye-fucks the camera whenever it's in the studio. I just don't think there's anything wrong with commenting on physical appearance. You know who else I think is really cute? Alex Borstein. Her voice, her face, her style; it just gets me in a certain way, in much the same way that PFT does. They are charming, they have a certain aura about them that invites affection. If you think I somehow objectify or belittle Borstein because of that, you are dead wrong. I recognize the disparities between males and females and I try to do my bit in fighting them too, but do you think I'm going to allow that affect the way I feel about a female comedian? If a comedian is "cute" or "sexy" or anything, does that have to affect how much I respect their talent and their comedy? Somebody already said, very succinctly, that talent (and of course respect) and attractiveness are not at all mutually exclusive.

 

I may not know what I'm talking about at all, but if anything I'd say the people who freak out about calling Lauren cute are the ones who are sexist. Why don't we all just live in reality, speak from our hearts, and see where that gets us? Honesty is the best policy, and in all honesty, Lauren (her face, her voice, her comedy, her style) is CUTE. I am of course using the definition that she is pleasing, delightful, keen, clever and pretty. If that's sexist and that's the kind of thing somebody could get warned or banned for, then ban me right now. That's fucking bullshit. Lauren is cute. PFT is cute. Scott is cute as fuck. What's the problem? Please don't say that it's because there are more comments about female guests/hosts than male guests/hosts, because you're barking up a statistical tree. If these forums were populated by a majority of heterosexual females, then the comments would be different. As someone who wakes up to multiple posts of ripped male bodies and "happy ____day" posts from females on Facebook, I can tell you, it's a matter of social circles and not some kind of dark patriarchal cloud looming over society, although I know that shit exists too. Let's just try to keep it a bit lighter in these comedy podcast forums, because after all, these are comedy podcast forums.

 

TL;DR: You are not a horrible person, nor a brainless misogynist, for thinking Lauren Lapkus is cute. PFT is cute too.

[KajusX 1807]

I haven't seen Wild Horses, but I did just attend a live i4h with Stephanie Allynne on the panel (I'm assuming if you like Allynne then you're listening to i4h), and she was great, as usual. (Also, I did not realize that Allynne was dating Tig until I just googled her, and now it makes sense that I saw Tig at the show outside of the context of 'Oh, Tig sees shows too!')

 

I should go see WIld Horses tho. These ladies tear shit up. Whenever Lapkus posts a shot of a Wild Horses show on her instagram, it always looks like insane improv is going down.

[Darbler Cheesegarbler 1110]

I had no idea that Stephanie Allynne was dating Tig, but that is genuinely surprising! when I just read that, I had a mind-blown moment. I know it sounds so stupid, but one of the only reasons I'd like to live in the LA area is to see a bunch of these shows... I look at the tickets for Largo and I curse my existence, but I'll make it there someday soon... Also, a little bit off-topic but still in the wheelhouse, how the fuck do people even get tickets to Thrilling Adventure Hour? Does it usually require murder?

[VinsanityV22 500]

The Golden Duchess Cruise Line conceit was unnecessary if you ask me; Lauren, Mary, Erin and Stephanie were great without it. Everyone was weird and every bit was really funny - they could've done anything

 

Colin, as always, was a fantastic no.2 here as well. He always is! He should be around more! Why does he have to get acting jobs, dang it? lol.

 

Great episode. *In Adam Scott voice* This was a, uh, very fun time.

[A New Duck 307]

It felt like they more or less abandoned the premise before they got too deep into. There seemed to be something duplicitous going on under the surface of this Golden Duchess thing, but I think everyone just got too into digging around in their characters to even feel like that was necessary. It was a great excuse to get everyone in the same room, though!

[Darbler Cheesegarbler 1110]

@ Sly and Duck, I love when anybody dives in and doesn't even think about how deep they're swimming. Some first-timers epitomize this. Alex Borstein, Tears for Fears, Natasha Lyonne and Dane Cook are all great examples of recent first-timers, although Dane Cook is a little too WTF with Marc Maron until Neil Campbell's character arrives. Completely off-topic, but Chris Kattan was a bit too WTF on the Hooray Show too, or maybe it's just a bit, I don't know.

[ComedyGangBang 88]

 

There is a difference between having a crude name and then weighing in on a talk about sexism and harassment and have the words 'gang bang' in your title, I think.

 

 

whats wrong with a gang bang?

 

stop putting your morals on everyone else. Do you think all women are helpless and they need you to protect them? And their "honor"?

[ieatpants 720]

is lauren cute?

 

i dunno guys, that's a spicy meatball.

 

seriously though, when you fall in love, you can't control with whom or something like that. also, joe wengert, call me.

[CraigEminger 468]

Guys, I've heard of Hollywood Nights, but Hollywood White Knights? No thank you.

[HipGuide 196]

that was an astonishingly dumb comment by luke.

[Bernard_Shakey 3484]

 

Sorry for the double post, but yeah... As a heterosexual male, I have to say, I do find Lauren very cute (on many more levels than her physical appearance) but I think I've commented more on Paul F. Tompkins' appearance than anyone else's. The man is dapper and handsome, a great sense of style, and he eye-fucks the camera whenever it's in the studio. I just don't think there's anything wrong with commenting on physical appearance. You know who else I think is really cute? Alex Borstein. Her voice, her face, her style; it just gets me in a certain way, in much the same way that PFT does. They are charming, they have a certain aura about them that invites affection. If you think I somehow objectify or belittle Borstein because of that, you are dead wrong. I recognize the disparities between males and females and I try to do my bit in fighting them too, but do you think I'm going to allow that affect the way I feel about a female comedian? If a comedian is "cute" or "sexy" or anything, does that have to affect how much I respect their talent and their comedy? Somebody already said, very succinctly, that talent (and of course respect) and attractiveness are not at all mutually exclusive.

 

I may not know what I'm talking about at all, but if anything I'd say the people who freak out about calling Lauren cute are the ones who are sexist. Why don't we all just live in reality, speak from our hearts, and see where that gets us? Honesty is the best policy, and in all honesty, Lauren (her face, her voice, her comedy, her style) is CUTE. I am of course using the definition that she is pleasing, delightful, keen, clever and pretty. If that's sexist and that's the kind of thing somebody could get warned or banned for, then ban me right now. That's fucking bullshit. Lauren is cute. PFT is cute. Scott is cute as fuck. What's the problem? Please don't say that it's because there are more comments about female guests/hosts than male guests/hosts, because you're barking up a statistical tree. If these forums were populated by a majority of heterosexual females, then the comments would be different. As someone who wakes up to multiple posts of ripped male bodies and "happy ____day" posts from females on Facebook, I can tell you, it's a matter of social circles and not some kind of dark patriarchal cloud looming over society, although I know that shit exists too. Let's just try to keep it a bit lighter in these comedy podcast forums, because after all, these are comedy podcast forums.

 

TL;DR: You are not a horrible person, nor a brainless misogynist, for thinking Lauren Lapkus is cute. PFT is cute too.

Oddbomb pretty much nailed it with this^ post. C+ reply bro.

I'm not sure even if I like the idea of mods censoring us (whatever happened to wheelchair girl?) We seem mostly to be a well mannered bunch who aren't afraid to stand up to inappropriateness ourselves.

Also lets just be nice to each other and remember that we are all here for the same reason, (because you gotta laugh).

I'm hoping this post of mine:

Can we just stop and give props to the host with the most, the very dashing Mr. Scott Aukerman. Looking good bro.

...will make up for this post of mine:

Jocelyn DeBoer is giving me a Jostling DeBoner.

Please don't ban me Dan, I hath confessed my sins.