Episode 100 — Junior

[seanotron 2307]

Paul's Laserdisc library just gets more and more impressive.

[walterwoodsiv 215]

[BeingAllFishies 99]

GREAT episode, guys, happy 100th! I've gotta say, though, that Twins is a wonderful movie. And I enjoyed this one too, because I like gross horror movies.

Case in point: They use the song "I've Got You Under My Skin" several times in the film. Is this a clever little reference to pregnancy? That's so upsetting. I have a baby under my skin?

 

June almost pointed her out, but Schwarzenegger's research assistant is really worth a mention. For some reason, she chooses to deliver all her lines in a robotic monotone with an expressionless stare. Then at the end, she is suddenly fighting for Schwarzenegger and shouts something like "You stay away from him!" She doesn't jump in front of him or anything, she just yells it.

 

I also like that the janitor-mole calls Langella and says the doctors are talking about a "C-something," as if any adult human being, let alone a JANITOR AT A HOSPITAL, doesn't know what a C-section is.

 

And finally, since you mentioned someone naming their baby after June...

They're calling the baby Junior because they don't know the sex (why not?), and at the end when it's a girl, they decide instead to name her...Junior. I'm all for creative naming, but that's a terrible name for a girl. What about "June"? I was so certain he was going to say "June."

[lherman 35]

I love my little baby Zouks.

 

i gotta say my stomach dropped a bit when they said not to name a baby Rafi, because i actually *do* have a son named Rafi! but he was born before i knew anything about the league, or zouks, so i think i'm okay!

[jarrycanada 2483]

BTW here is a picture of junes baby..

 

[DanielSwinney 130]

Re: sex position... I think this would work: she's on her back, knees bent, legs spread, he's in between, thighs under hers, his preg-belly rests on her belly. He's still Arnold fucking Schwarzenegger. His hamstring power is still sick.

[walterwoodsiv 215]

You mentioned that Danny Devito had to fly back to the weird pregnancy place. But he was flying from Canada to California. And he beat Emma Thompson there! How the hell did he do that? The people were still outside Arnold's door. Was their an eight hour standoff?

[Hagbard Celine 290]

Star Wars Episode VIII: Melon Blasters

 

[Lukas Holmes 2287]

I love this and I really hope they aren't finished!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I still want them to do Dreamcatcher!!!!!

 

That is the one film I am surprised they haven't done. I watched it again recently and was blown away once more.

[katy4650 49]

Thanks to my year working in an IVF clinic, I know that the magazines get replaced once a month for the guys. it was assumed by the they were too 'sticky'' by then and they were put into a hazardous waste bag to be disposed of.

 

Good times!!

[Cal00 3]

I believe that this was a prequel to Eraserhead

[Kickpuncher 5012]

This was so much fun, and I agree that they don't need guests at all.

 

This episode is just begging for whoever has the GIVE ME YOUR BABY Memzoukas to re-post it.

[ParrotTalkBack 110]

Had to watch this terrible movie on Xbox Video, which was infuriating. Can only imagine the internet pipes were being clogged by people streaming The Interview. Anyway...

 

PARTIAL CORRECTION: During the episode, Jason says "In 100 episodes, we've never said 'milky tits'". This is only partially correct! In the very first HDTGM episode - Burlesque - June mentions Christina Aguilera's "milky breasts" which Paul, Jason and Nick Kroll then riff on for quite a while with hilarious consequences.

[ParrotTalkBack 110]

Also: June was extra cute on this episode, I love when she does shit that makes the boys laugh, and I love when she cackles.

 

And when the guys are being gross and she does commentary in the background, "This is what I'm talking about... this is disgusting"

[demagog_dog 50]

[Joe Lerini 7329]

I was laughing at the concept of Schwarzenegger + glasses = Smartsenegger, and continued to laugh throughout the episode. So good. Looking forward to the next hundo.

[VajayjayLeno 336]

I just want to love this episode for loving Emma Thompson so much.

 

That's the most important takeaway from watching this awful movie: Emma Thompson is a radiant star who is the best part of anything she's in.

[TheShanster 11]

Wow... awesome episode. Paul mentioned this... but I feel like its crazy that they are testing this pill on men when it is to solve a problem for women. I feel like its almost implying that women need men to solve all their problems and that isn't something I think we need to watch in a movie....its just such a weird thing that I feel like scientists would never actually do.

[coconutcara 3]

You guys forgot to mention that Junior was nominated for an ACADEMY AWARD!!!!

 

The nomination was for Best Original Song (there was an original song????) and it lost, but nonetheless, that's crazy!

 

Not to mention the Golden Globe nods to both Emma Thompson (deservedly) and Arnold Schwarzenegger (questionable?)!!!!

 

Perhaps Junior isn't so bad after all!

[Bumpy 1674]

You guys forgot to mention that Junior was nominated for an ACADEMY AWARD!!!!

 

The nomination was for Best Original Song (there was an original song????) and it lost, but nonetheless, that's crazy!

 

Not to mention the Golden Globe nods to both Emma Thompson (deservedly) and Arnold Schwarzenegger (questionable?)!!!!

 

Perhaps Junior isn't so bad after all!

 

This reminds of when someone hears a celebrity they really like is a scientologist.

[BeingAllFishies 99]

Wow... awesome episode. Paul mentioned this... but I feel like its crazy that they are testing this pill on men when it is to solve a problem for women. I feel like its almost implying that women need men to solve all their problems and that isn't something I think we need to watch in a movie....its just such a weird thing that I feel like scientists would never actually do.

 

Very true. Not to mention that they don't even for a second consider just testing it on a woman without telling anyone. Why isn't this the first idea they have? They work at a clinic and would have plenty of volunteers, but for some reason DeVito really really wants to impregnate a dude. In fact, they know a woman who studies fertility...and doesn't mind testing on herself...and wants a baby. DeVito says that they have to be like Jenner and test on themselves, but again, testing it on DeVito isn't even brought up until the throwaway joke at the end. They just assume from the beginning that that baby is going in Arnold. It's like they saw the trailer.

[nrkist 71]

Wow... awesome episode. Paul mentioned this... but I feel like its crazy that they are testing this pill on men when it is to solve a problem for women. I feel like its almost implying that women need men to solve all their problems and that isn't something I think we need to watch in a movie....its just such a weird thing that I feel like scientists would never actually do.

 

What? Why are you reading all this into it? Their project couldn't get funding, so they did the most absurd thing possible to force a premise for a film. I guess it could have been a female actor in the role...but then the entire premise of the film falls apart.

 

Look, the 'gag' requires a real 'manly-man' becomes pregnant and goes through all the stages of pregnancy...because...it's hilarious? I dunno, it's just a really bad gag, and not the insidious commentary you are bringing to the table.

 

This episode was kinda off to me. They spent alot of time seriously discussing the ridiculous mechanics of the pregnancy...which isn't funny. I mean, it's the gag. Your supposed to look at the very VHS/DVD cover of prego-schwarzenegger mugging at the camera, slap your thigh, and gasp between tearful, gut-bursting guffaws, "HOW'S THAT GONNA WORK?!"

 

Like, I dunno. It's a really stupid film, but arguing the logistics of the pregnancy...like, it's the 'joke'. It's not supposed to make sense. It absolutely CAN'T make sense. So I dunno what they were really delving for half this episode. There is a film in their minds where a man injects himself with a baby...and what? It's not as terrible as Junior?

 

The thing that makes Junior so bad, is that even if you meet the premise half-way...everything about the film is still terrible. Terrible even for a film about a guy injecting himself with a baby, terrible.

 

Edit: What I mean is, they normally establish the premise, take some funny jabs at it, and quickly get into the bits of absurd internal logic, production decisions, and performances. I feel like this episode never got out of first gear.

[hypnotizingchickens 1025]

corrections and omissions:

 

I think it deserves to be mentioned that this movie shared two crucial plot points with Monkey Shines: awkward morning calisthenics and monkeys. lots of monkeys.

 

also, no reference to Arnold licking cake off an infant's foot in the last scene...? C'MONNNN!

[wiscomedy 212]

Very true. Not to mention that they don't even for a second consider just testing it on a woman without telling anyone. Why isn't this the first idea they have? They work at a clinic and would have plenty of volunteers, but for some reason DeVito really really wants to impregnate a dude.

 

Well, I think within the bananapants premise of the thing, with the caveat that I'm basing this entirely on the podcast summary of the science:

 

* they have a drug that they think will prevent immune systems from mis-identifying embryos as foreign objects and attacking them, thereby preventing miscarriages;

* if they inject the drug and embryo into a woman, they won't be able to tell whether it really worked or if the pregnancy just happened to work out normally, because women have bodies that will accept and nourish a pregnancy;

* but if they inject the drug and embryo into a man and his body accepts the pregnancy, they know it definitely actually works.

 

Since the testing is illegal and can't use multiple subjects -- and because they're PLANNING to abort after a few weeks -- using a man "makes sense" given that set of ludicrous assumptions.

[Elektra Boogaloo 3371]

That's the most important takeaway from watching this awful movie: Emma Thompson is a radiant star who is the best part of anything she's in.

 

Truth!!

 

Next year's Howdies should have a category "best actress trying to make a terrible comedy work" or something with nominees Emma Thompson and Dolly Parton.

 

Small nitpick: Emma wrote Sense and Sensibility not Pride and Prejudice.