Episode 73 — The Gilmore Guys, Our Close Friend

[agata 2789]

Sean and Hayes punish America for discussing a dress picture when there are real problems in the world. Then it's time for a high-tech new segment, Riff'rent Strokes for Different Jokes: Academy Burn-Wards Edition where the guys play a recording of their live Oscar riffing. Finally, Demi Adejuyigbe and Kevin Porter, THE GILMORE GUYS, enter the studio to explain why they copied Hayes and Sean and listen to some clips from Wolfcool's many new TV episode review podcasts.

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

Cool.

[Andy Dick Cheney 3779]

Furst!!!

 

 

Edit 1: Shoot I spelled "Firts" wrong.

 

Edit 2: Darn. I did it again. UGH.

 

Edit 3: Guh! Turns out I wasn't actually first.

 

Edit 4: Wait a second. Is first even a thing people do in comments sections anymore?

 

Edit 5: Bloody heck. I don't think it is.

 

Edit 5: Bloody heck. I don't think it is.

 

Edit 6: Golly gee. I accidentally quoted myself.

 

Edit 7: I better delete all this and go back to bed or none of the other cool board members will think I'm a happening guy anymore.

 

Edit 8: Cripes!! My delete button on my expensive computer isn't working. Now I'm in trouble. I better pay a visit to the Geek Squad.

 

Edit 9: Dang. Best Buy is closed until 9AM.

 

Edit 10: Remember when people posted "First" on comments threads. That was truly the golden age of the internet.

 

Edit 11: WOW!! Is that Drake Bell pulling over in his Porsche and rolling down the window?

 

Edit 12: It is!! I'm going to ask him how Josh Peck lost all that darn weight from his butt.

 

Edit 13: ARGH!! Drake Bell just put his cigar out in my eye and now he's stabbing me with a Nickelodeon pen and laughing. HELP ME!!

 

Edit 14:

 

[A Bear 1813]

I liked how the Oscars clip they were watching was slowed down – it made all the people sound drunk! Lay off the sauce, Meryl!

 

"Not my tempo."

[Gym Sockerman 1326]

Those is some great Oscar riffs. Really makes me appreciate how movies is, in fact, the best.

[devscoots 2561]

I would like to extend my sincere congratulations to Sean and Hayes for rising above the machinations of these Gilmore Girl guys to produce hot content despite the nipping at their heels from so-called "competitors" tryna steal their formats. SMH at these upstarts thinkin they don't have to pay their dues.

 

It's no wonder Nokia (of Finland) went down the tubes, these guys are steal the phoneys!

[dixon 5920]

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

Bag of tomatoes: "One bite of our delicious tomatoes will send you straight to Heaven."

Me: "I knew it! Tomatoes ARE poisonous!"

 

Also, with all the taxes I pay, I think the least I can expect is for someone from the National Institute of Standards and Technology to sit down and work something out between the people who make bread and the people who make sandwich bags. Because they are different sizes -- the bags are too small.

 

These jokes are based on a true story. When writing comedy, it's important to start from a place of personal experience, and this morning I personally experienced making a sandwich.

 

Edit: I'm not done listening to today's ep, when I'm done with it I'll let you know if it was good or not. Hold your horse's.

[Game of Scones 5812]

Really disapointed I didn't get to ask these gents a question. I guess I'll do it now.

 

1. Did guys watch that show?

 

2. Really?

 

3. Agree to disagree?

[Bozos of Basketball 3689]

The only Gilmore girls I can think of are Virginia Venit, his grandma and the older woman he sleeps with that says, "Heyyyyyy... you no want breakfast?!"

[dixon 5920]

Congrats Greggy.

[mwn 5470]

Have not listened yet but I did not know @electrolemon was one of the Gilmore Guys guys. Which I also haven't listened to because I never peeped the TV show at all ever. but that guy is very funny on twitter, so, #neato and #ff

Hope everyone is well this morning and I promise to probably report back once I've listened to the thing.

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

Have not listened yet but I did not know @electrolemon was one of the Gilmore Guys guys. Which I also haven't listened to because I never peeped the TV show at all ever. but that guy is very funny on twitter, so, #neato and #ff

Hope everyone is well this morning and I promise to probably report back once I've listened to the thing.

 

#ff ? I never realized that was the fartface emoji.

 

Edit: Hahahah!

[greggy 15909]

well shit, now what will i complain about

[chanson 9697]

Literally clapped out loud when I heard the popcorn gallery theme.

[Lukas Holmes 2287]

The oscar riffs were the funniest thing I've heard in a long time.

[alargebucket 1589]

well shit, now what will i complain about

Well, you technically don't have the Hollywood Handbook Pro Version yet, Greggy. They were still in the Psych podcast when it happened, which is maybe the ultime psych. Don't lose your edge.

 

Stay hungry, Greggy. Don't let desperation get the best of you. If it's all right, then you're all wrong. I know you know they just don't have any proof. Embrace the deception, learn how to bend. Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end.

[dixon 5920]

Where can I get a subscription to Harper Lee Magazine?

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

Where can I get a subscription to Harper Lee Magazine?

I don't know, it's a famously cantankerous and reclusive magazine. It was basically published once and never heard from again.

[DEATHMAN 3317]

These two "Gilmore Guys" jokers claim their podcast is real popular, but I doubt it because apparently being on your show is the first time they got their picture taken

[Andrew 4646]

Notes time!:

• 161MB?! Uh, is podcasts FLAC now lol
  
• Sean knows models' names and he made a The Game reference last week - because of this I can tell he is a cool alpha bro like me who loves ladies and boobies and butties and so forth.
  
• Hayes was so close to getting Sean to say Reality Bites
  
• The Lootcrate guy from my train pic last week is reading a manga - he is too much of a nerd and it is getting difficult to keep resisting the urge to shove him into a locker or kick sand into his face at the beach
  
• Sean seems riled up about these Isis guys and you just know he is itching to just destroy them with a great big punch - uh, I have a idea, Obama - why not just unleash him in Middle East? Too scared about the oils?
  
• What's a shingle?
  
• All these podcasts are giving a strong UTU2TM vibe.
  
• Wagwan with all the lottery tickets?
  

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Looks like they kicked up the bitrate from 112 VBR to 320. Nice job, engineers!

[Schnickpot 63]

48:24-39: amazing.

[alargebucket 1589]

Notes time!:

• 161MB?! Uh, is podcasts FLAC now lol
  

I know you Britons get carried away with your dry humor sometimes, but this is actually very serious and not at all a joke. I missed my train this morning because of this file size. For all I care, it can take its 161 megabytes and go FLAC itself. There I was at half past eight running around the neighborhood near my train stop looking for some sucker with unprotected Wi-Fi because Steve Jobs' little pet project has some kind of 100 MB Oliver Twist download cap. So, let's just say Apple's got me all, "Please, sir, can I have some more... UH INTERNET?", even on AT&T - The Nation's Most Reliable 4G LTE Network with 10GB of lightning fast rollover eligible data...

 

Well, it's 2015 and dogs can marry horses and you can kill your kid at whatever age just as long as he hasn't said, "mama" or "papa", yet, but when a phone doesn't update itself overnight because of a power outage, a desperate and incontinent man has to scrounge around Boston for that sweet, sweet Wi-Hi because some Surfer Engineer thinks WAV output sounds pretty tubular, ya dig? Well, missing a train is only tubular in London, brother.

 

TANKS BUT NO TANKS

 

Note: This actually happened, but it's NBD. 320 is my 420.

[robinsbruce 4985]

Verizon and Samsung wouldn't do you like that bro. the bigger the better as far as I'm concerned. More room for sean and Hayes you know what. I mean *cough cough* you know what I'm sayin? You get it? I'll go think of a few more ways to ask if you are comprehending the texts I'm writin.