Episode 87 — Whitmer Thomas and Clay Tatum, Our Close Friend

[JMonsterface 1974]

And now, a word from our sponsors.

 

"We're the Goblin Guys*,

Yo check us out,

We'll tell you what we're

all about!

 

Spending time

with our cool friends.

That way the party

Never ends!

 

At least not until

8 PM,

When we wave

Goodbye to them.

 

It's so important

To get rest,

So we can function

At our best!

 

And get great grades,

And pass our tests,

So that our dads

don't get depressed!

 

We know that Gargoyles

Might seem cool,

But they're just Goblins

Who break rules!

 

So study hard,

Keep your mind sharp,

And never go out

After dark.

 

Stay under blankets

In your bed

So Gargoyles won't

Chop off your head!"

 

*Goblin Guys is a registered trademark of Forumers Against Gargoyles.

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

 

I will take this under consideration. Can we think about changing the name?

 

Hmph. Haven't even been through orientation and you're already trying to change the name? I like your gumption! We might have to fast-track you to that Treasurer's Assistant position.

 

Maybe we can brainstorm about rebranding the group at the next rally. To be frank, I've been thinking that maybe naming our anti-gang program after a slang for "cigarette" might not be the best idea.

[NoahTomaszewski 2768]

Are the Goblin Guyz like the Tunnel Snakes at all? They rule.

 

 

New Vegas is still better though

[Blink 1844]

Are the Goblin Guyz like the Tunnel Snakes at all? They rule.

 

 

New Vegas is still better though

I can't believe I'm angry that I can't play a dumb social engineering game attached to a digital video game store's sale event because millions of others want to also.

[chanson 9697]

I like your gumption!

 

What is this, an advertisement for Nick Offerman's book?

[Game of Scones 5812]

Oranges is the new black is the new hotness is coming back, baby.

[jmoneyfresh 49]

Oranges is the new black is the new hotness is coming back, baby.

 

Listen I don't mean to nitpick, but I'm fairly certain the phrase is "Oranges: the New Black." N'est-ce pas?

 

Can't remember where I heard that...

 

[Jakal 4475]

 

What is this, an advertisement for Nick Offerman's book?

I also had to google the word Grumption, high five bro!

[Game of Scones 5812]

Listen I don't mean to nitpick, but I'm fairly certain the phrase is "Oranges: the New Black." N'est-ce pas?

 

Can't remember where I heard that...

 

that's not canon

[Blink 1844]

I thought we were supposed to rag on Aukerman-coined bits

 

That's part of the HH training

[devscoots 2561]

Hey so I'm super drunk and love everyone's vfanfiction

 

here goes

 

 

devscoots manfully appraises several situations at once on account of how good he is. joe mcgurl preens himself. classic joe.

 

hayes and sean both are gainfully employed and are noit requiring devscoots patronage, devscots is happy about this.

 

 

chanson's dad is all het up zabout some kinda boat captainy stuff, various I rish pweeps concur. devscoots still has some kind of a jawline. this is good.

 

 

we all fuck each other. the end.

[Casaba 5942]

Hey so I'm super drunk and love everyone's vfanfiction

 

here goes

 

 

devscoots manfully appraises several situations at once on account of how good he is. joe mcgurl preens himself. classic joe.

 

hayes and sean both are gainfully employed and are noit requiring devscoots patronage, devscots is happy about this.

 

 

chanson's dad is all het up zabout some kinda boat captainy stuff, various I rish pweeps concur. devscoots still has some kind of a jawline. this is good.

 

 

we all fuck each other. the end.

 

This is the best thing I've read in years. Solid ending too. You got something here, kid.

[devscoots 2561]

Thank you 'staz. my INCREDIBLY lucrative line of romance novels is in the pipeline, I shall hereafter be known as "Prudence McFuckalot (and really have a good time with it) esq."

[chanson 9697]

Hey so I'm super drunk and love everyone's vfanfiction

 

here goes

 

 

devscoots manfully appraises several situations at once on account of how good he is. joe mcgurl preens himself. classic joe.

 

hayes and sean both are gainfully employed and are noit requiring devscoots patronage, devscots is happy about this.

 

 

chanson's dad is all het up zabout some kinda boat captainy stuff, various I rish pweeps concur. devscoots still has some kind of a jawline. this is good.

 

 

we all fuck each other. the end.

 

It's only Thursday and I think we may have found this week's winner of the forums.

[dixon 5920]

The smell was the first thing Officer Snort Gordly noticed as he entered the dimly lit room. He recognized the stench immediately. This was the third night in a row he'd have to come home to his wife and kids reeking of mouthwash. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, the form of a lifeless body came into view, seemingly tied down to a chair in the middle of the room. Snort approached the body cautiously, taking the whole scene in. He recognized the body immediately from the missing persons report, Spunky Foonerism, a local anti-gang activist and community leader. His head had been forced back against the chair, his mouth still full of mouthwash. The empty Listerine bottle lay on the floor next to him.

 

"Yellow. Again. They couldn't even go with blue," Snort muttered to no one in particular.

 

After a few minutes of studying the crime scene, something caught Snort's eye. Up until that point, the scene looked like an exact copy of the last two murders of anti-gang officials from earlier in the week. Snort pulled out a pair of tweezers from his crime scene kit, and reached them into Spunky's front pocket.

 

"You got something?" yelled out the cop at the door guarding the crime scene.

 

"Seems our buddies left us a note."

 

Snort pulled out a crumpled white napkin from the dead man's pocket, and tried to make sense of the scribbled red letters.

 

"The - Gargle - Boyz - are - back - in - town."

 

"Who the fuck are the Gargle Boyz?"

[xoValeriexo 4369]

Spunky, I definitely want to join your anti-gang league, but I agree with my good friend SteveH that we have to change the name. My suggestion is to add "naughty" in there. Forumers Against Naughty Gangs. I don't think any of us would claim to be against a good gang, like say The Buttercream Gang. It's important to have specificity in a group title. It could even work as Forumers Against Naughty Gargoyle Gangs if our primary aim is to take down the Boyz.

[Andy Dick Cheney 3779]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_Z0LbBETk0

[Houston 4819]

1900 Hours. The call came in. Pauly Shore was dead. Official report states he weezed to much jUice. I knew better. The piss writing on the wall said "Who you calling HOMO NOW".

 

I can't say I agree with those Gargoyle Boyz (Gargle Boyz?) (Gaggle of Menchildz?), but justice is justice.

[devscoots 2561]

thank you adc for reaffirming that i know for a fact 100% that mel b is the best, most good looking spice girl

[Andy Dick Cheney 3779]

Well if you want her future you better forget her past. If you want to get with her you better make it last.

 

Now don't go wasting her precious time. get your act together and you'll be just fine.

 

She'll tell you what she wants what she really really wants so tell her what you want what you really really want.

 

If you wanna be her lover though, you gotta get with her friends and make it last forever because friendship never ends.

 

I could go on

 

 

P.S Make SURE you Slam your body down and wind it all around.

[souprman 10477]

UPDATE;

 

thread holding together nicely.

 

MY WEEK;

 

bad sore throat many doctors.

Anchorman say my words.

PFT answer my question.

I piss people off.

Besser invite me on I4H.

Throat start to feel better.

 

WEATHER;

 

Rain, Temp 60, Dew Point 59

 

WEED;

 

Yep.

[robotam 4493]

 

Anyone want to take part?

[DEATHMAN 3317]

I have a very serious potato picture to submit...stay tuned to this post...

[honlads 8798]

Just thought I'd leave this here.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSra1H3SU9E

 

Not trying to be rude, i respect anyone that fingerboards, but their technique is so sloppy (no command of the board) I'm just watching like wtf no disrespect but some of these camera angles are just taking the piss.

[broncotruck11 250]

I'm not a fan of this JoeMcGurl guy...who does he think he is coming up with 'rules' for posting here in the Hollywood Handbook forums. You don't have a monopoly on the comments section guy!