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EPISODE 114 — The Secret Story of the Missing Episode

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July makes me feel safe.

July's my favourite month too

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July's my favourite month too

No points for you.

 

 

Edit: What a waste of my 200th post! In the end, the one with no points was the Points Minister himself.

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July's my favourite month too

free bird

 

 

 

play free bird

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Ok well actually Jagr is a fucking legend, so I get what you're doing, Hayes, but just watch it man. Have some fuckin respect. Guy was scoring goals when you were still shitting your fuckin diapers. I'd like to see what you're doing when you're 43--sitting on a fuckin SOFA I bet. Yeah, ok pal, enjoy your SOFA CUSHIONS. Meanwhile, Jagr will just keep playing shockingly decent hockey at the age of 43. Only hockey players are that tough. Ever heard of anything like that in any of these other soft sports? Yeah, exactly. That's because guys like Jagr don't waste their youths dancing around in the end zone like a Spice Girl or posing for watch ads, unlike some "athletes" I could name. What's happening to America smh

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Finally, and I don't want to say TOO much about this: you Allen Covert fans are in luck. "The Covert Operation" is coming Spring 2016.

On the set of Grown Ups, Allen Covert asked me if I smelled french fries; will this be covered on the show?

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to me, those podcasts all sound like VERY solid 8s, great work mr jake

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We're hoping to get "I'm Not Rapaport" off the ground in early 2016. We're still playing around with the concept, but let me just say this: If you've been wondering what "The Colbert Report" would sound like if it was hosted by Michael Rapaport, you're gonna love the show. What do you guys think of the title "The Rapaport Report?"

 

 

Will vice principal Scott Guber be make an appearance somewhere during the run?

 

edit: I loved boston public back in the day is a thing about me

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No points for you.

 

 

Edit: What a waste of my 200th post! In the end, the one with no points was the Points Minister himself.

Lmao fail

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lol hahah yes Anthony Cumia is so funny to say because remember when he was fired for tweeting horrible things and then also remember just now when he was arrested for hurting his girlfriend

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Anthony Cumin -- yumyumyum what a spicy comedian

 

I like to get whole seeds then toast them a bit before grinding em up

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As Silvrwoman's very best friend and sometimes comedic collaborator, I am beyond honored to accept my half of her pro version. Never has a pro version been so deserved. Congratulations to me and also a huge thank you to me. I never could have done it without the support of my natural hilarity and the encouragement of my amazing personality. Peace be with all of you and with myself, mostly. What a joyous day.

Thank you Hayes (and Ashley)!!!!!

 

I've never been so happy!

 

I'm dedicating my Pro-Version to Ashley. And as Ashley's very best friend and comedic collaborator, I am honored to accept half of this dedication. Congratulations to me for receiving both this week's Pro-Version and 1/2 of the Pro-Version dedication. I couldn't have done it without the support of my own generosity. Thus, I'd like to dedicate the Pro-Version and Pro-Version dedication to myself. I don't have time to do the math, but I think I did pretty well today.

 

And Norm, I don't know what's going on, sorry.

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Hey everybody,

 

Just wanted to check in and say we've got some really exciting things in development at Earwolf East.

 

We're hoping to get "I'm Not Rapaport" off the ground in early 2016. We're still playing around with the concept, but let me just say this: If you've been wondering what "The Colbert Report" would sound like if it was hosted by Michael Rapaport, you're gonna love the show. What do you guys think of the title "The Rapaport Report?"

 

Yes, the rumors are true. We WILL be partnering with Anthony Cumia and bringing "The Anthony Cumia Show" into the Earwolf East family! Big thanks to Tom Scharpling for handling things with Ant over this difficult weekend.

 

Finally, and I don't want to say TOO much about this: you Allen Covert fans are in luck. "The Covert Operation" is coming Spring 2016.

 

Semper Fi,

 

Gen. Jake Fogelnest

 

I don't know some of these references but the important thing is I can now go look them up and make this a learning experience, then come back and riff on some of these names

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you get to keep your 'host' status on the forums even if you don't do a podcast on earwolf anymore? That's a pretty sweet job perk. Probably how they got WTF to move over to Howl.

 

Adam Sachs: "...and even if you decide to stop doing the show, you'll get to keep your 'host' designation on the earwolf message boards forever."

 

Marc Maron: "Pow! I just shit my pants! Where do I sign?"

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Hey guys, in the spirit of giving and all that bullshit, I'm going to make a special offer to my friends1 on this forum. If there is something that you would like to see an extreme closeup of, I will take a photomicrograph2 of anything you want3 and post it here. Happy Winter Solstice, the worst day of the year!

 

1 For the sake of this exercise, I am considering all of you to be my friends. For my forum enemies[chiknsammich!4 ] your status is unchanged for all other purposes.

 

2 I will take the object of your choice and use a camera and a microscope to take a picture of it.

 

3 It has to be something to which I have access to, and it has to be small enough to fit below the microscope lens. So for those of you who were about to say you want to see my dick, no can do. It's way too big for that. Too big, and also too veiny and too throbbing.

 

4 This is a joke, chickingsangwich is not my enemy at all he is a nice guy and I love him like a cousin. We just had a terrible misunderstanding that devolved into a violent gangster rap battle startlingly quickly. Please let's not repeat the mistakes of 2015 as we enter the new year.

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