kobthatreal 5896 Posted January 10, 2015 FUCK THA RAVENS. LETS GO PATS. 4 Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted January 10, 2015 I peed the bed on another girl last night. I’m in a bit of a situation, because it was in HER bed. She left for work at like 8 AM and kissed me and said “those were seven of the best orgasms I’ve ever had” and I woke up at 10 AM in the middle of a large, wet, piss circle. The real question is – does she already know?? Did I pee during those 2 hours?? Or was I just too sleepy to notice the pee and she probably knows about it too?? I think she was kinda laughing at me so she probably knows, but I have to text her soon ‘cause she gets off work in an hour. 5 Share this post Link to post
Joe McGurl 8358 Posted January 10, 2015 The only comedian that I've seen is Louis Black because Scranton is a comedy death-hole that has only produced one truly funny person and that person is Joe McGurl. Anyway, Louis Black didn't have an opener but I probably could have done it but I would have been funnier and Louis Black would have been booed off stage for not being me, so I declined. 3 Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted January 10, 2015 I really need to get back into standup because that's a good way for me to become just like my heroes sean and hayes. Share this post Link to post
DEATHMAN 3317 Posted January 10, 2015 Showshowbro... Just do all her laundry for her, including the bed sheets, and make it look like you were just being nice You really blew it by being honest 5 Share this post Link to post
chanson 9697 Posted January 10, 2015 Just say you peed in her bed to claim it as yours like a dog. And then when she looks at you like it's weird tell her that she really needs to get in touch with nature more and that it's disgusting how much she hates animals and that's why she'll never find a husband. Edit: assuming that she wants to find a husband and it's totally cool with me if she doesn't because women don't need men to be successful. But they should fucking care about animals. 3 Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted January 10, 2015 the thing is that I woke up around 1 and I had to leave for work at like 2. at this point, she's "pissed" that I left the sheets on the floor. but yeah shitlord, you're totally right there's no reason I couldn't have dropped the laundry off. I was thinking I could say I brought my dog over and he did the peeing, but then I went the other way. I think telling the truth is good as it brings me one step closer to being just like my heroes sean and hayes. 2 Share this post Link to post
DEATHMAN 3317 Posted January 10, 2015 Well what are you gonna do now that you're single and a known bed-pisser 6 Share this post Link to post
Casaba 5942 Posted January 10, 2015 Did anyone see Don't Stop or We'll Die open for Alkaline Trio? I was really pumped when I heard that was happening, but I don't live anywhere near where cool stuff like that goes down. I really want to see Don't Stop or We'll Die. But they don't play much, especially outside of LA. On NYE I saw Kumail Nanjiani, Moshe Kasher, Natasha Legerro, Brent Weinbach, Stroy Moyd, and another fella whose name I can't remember. 2 Share this post Link to post
greggy 15909 Posted January 10, 2015 I really need to get back into standup because that's a good way for me to become just like my heroes sean and hayes. you got to get this story on the stage, this bed-pissing material is very relateable to all adults 3 Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted January 10, 2015 Shitlord, I’ll probably work hard and make the right decisions just like my heroes sean and hayes. Greggy, I do prop comic anti-comedy in the vain of a bruce chandling or a dan klein. The other comedians like it, and the audience tends to hate it. How many prop comics does it take to screw in a lightbulb??? 2 Share this post Link to post
skizelo 2536 Posted January 10, 2015 hey! bozos! count me in for the old g-chat. gmail address is the same as the user-handle. 2 Share this post Link to post
Casaba 5942 Posted January 10, 2015 Shoshone, two thoughts: 1. How drunk were you that you pissed in the bed and yet were still able to have sex? 2. If she isn't understanding of the pee, then she's not a keeper. 3 Share this post Link to post
showshowbro 1177 Posted January 10, 2015 She’s for sure a keeper – two big round bouncy keepers. Lol. But yeah I smoothed things over with some bouquet emoticons. I was soo fricked up that I forgot to put on my pullups. And ya idk Anastasia, I’m very similar to my heroes sean and hayes in that I’m dtf in all conditions. 4 Share this post Link to post
honlads 8798 Posted January 10, 2015 I wish corpsef*cker and assblaster would do the hangout too. 4 Share this post Link to post
Joe McGurl 8358 Posted January 10, 2015 I've never seen a comedian live. But he's seen plenty of them die... This summer, Honlads is, "The Comedian Killer." Get ready, you'll literally die laughing. 5 Share this post Link to post
DEATHMAN 3317 Posted January 10, 2015 I didn't know you guys were doin it and also I don't got a webcam or a mic so 1 Share this post Link to post
xoValeriexo 4369 Posted January 11, 2015 I saw Gary Gulman open for Louis CK in Boston. It was great. Gulman is v underrated in my opinion. I love Gary Gulman too! Even though I voted for John Heffron when they were both in the final 2 on Last Comic Standing. Sorry, Gary, but I was young and very attracted to John Heffron. Did you ever listen to Todd Glass' old podcast Comedy and Everything Else? Gary was on it a few times and he is just so likeable. PFT had some classic appearances on that too. There's one where he tells the female cohost to shut-up upwards of 30 times. It's amazing. Have you seen Henry's movie Punching the Clown? It's wonderful and he just made a sequel. 2 Share this post Link to post
chanson 9697 Posted January 11, 2015 I saw Jeff Dye live one time. I also saw Joe McHale at a Thai restaurant on Vashon Island... But that wasn't a comedy show. Oh and Nick Thune was a counselor at the Boys and Girls Club I went to after school, but you guys already knew that. Also not a comedy show. 3 Share this post Link to post
honlads 8798 Posted January 11, 2015 But he's seen plenty of them die... This summer, Honlads is, "The Comedian Killer." Get ready, you'll literally die laughing. Back alley, behind a comedy club. Door opens. Laughter is heard, emanating from within. Male comedian (36) emerges, calling back to his friends. COMEDIAN: Yeah, man! Haha! It tasted like goddamn shit! Comedian begins to take a cigarette out as he closes the door. He is a little startled as he notices Honlads standing in the shadows. Honlads is wearing a sinister big coat. COMEDIAN: Woah!! Hey man! Wow. You scared me there. What are you doing back here? Hey, you got a light? HONLADS: Hmm. [Honlads steps out into the dim light of the alley. He grins, smugly. He has so many teeth.] I guess you could say I have a light. Honlads raises his arm high above his head and begins to bludgeon the comedian with, like, a lamp or something. 7 Share this post Link to post
Spunky Foonerism 8561 Posted January 11, 2015 I've also never seen live comedy. I'm okay with it, because I'm a super serious person and don't really like funny things. People around me say "Lets go see a comedian and laugh at him." I typically reply, "Fuck off, and go 'have fun.' I don't even know you. I'm going to sit in a graveyard and read some Emily Dickinson poems." 4 Share this post Link to post
xoValeriexo 4369 Posted January 11, 2015 I just got tickets to see John Mulaney on the 30th, so now I have that to look forward to. Hmm.. what would get you guys talking? Let's see... Well, when we had our Google Hangout the other night Chanson said he thinks Sean and Hayes might talk to us there someday. Anastasia and BRRII disagreed. What do you guys think? 2 Share this post Link to post
