Episode 98.5 — Minisode 98.5

[AnnieStone 153]

/watching A View to a Kill/ Why did they make that one Muppet out of leather?

[jarrycanada 2483]

 

Nope, he died in 1995.

 

That's too bad, How are they going to make a new twin peaks with out bob. I don't think that can be done.

 

 

I wish they could of picked this tv movie to do rather then View to a kill, there is only one greatest villain of all time.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8W60ZmuO0YE

 

anyone else try and watch that ? God was that horrible, it was like a dinner theater version of peter pan.

[Darbler Cheesegarbler 1110]

Paul really made me laugh during this minisode, but when he said "funny money" I could only think of one thing:

 

https://www.youtube....h?v=fGCmAM6Oafc

[Blast Hardcheese 636]

A View To A Kill is not a great Bond movie, granted. But the worst James Bond film? Not even close.

 

Both Moonraker and Thunderball are much, much worse, and would definitely make for great HDTGM fodder. By far, though, Die Another Day is one of the absolute worst piece of shit movie - Bond or otherwise. Here is a rundown of the most egregious moments from this cinematic turd:

 

* The invisible Aston-Martin.

* Gene replacement surgery.

* Madonna sings both the horrendous theme song AND gets a small speaking part, for which she "acts" out her nose.

* The bad guy's body armor Nintendo suit.

* Yet another diamond-powered laser satellite.

* "Death for breakfast."

* Laughably bad CGI wind surfing.

* Holodeck simulated sex.

* Fuckin' Haley Barry, man…

 

And so, so much more.

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

I have to agree with Mr. Hardcheese regarding Die Another Day. Fuck that movie. As for View to a Kill? I LOVE it. It's out-and-out ridiculous, but it's objectively better than the even sillier Moonraker, plus it has a better supporting cast and music.

 

Quantum of Solace is not a great Bond film and suffers from being stuck between what are, in my opinion, two great entries in the series, However, it has really intense and believable performances from its villain and Bond Girl, and it looks absolutely gorgeous. I encourage everyone to re-watch this one and just take note of how just-plain-pretty it is. It's not as purely cinematic as Skyfall, but that has Roger Motherfucking Deakins [let us bow before him] as the cinematographer. It took me a while to warm up to Quantum, but I am now a staunch defender of its merits, even with its faults.

[seanotron 2307]

Die Another Day is truly terrible, but as I argued elsewhere I also think it's incredibly un-fun to sit through. No one in that movie is being fun terrible, they're just being generically terrible. The bad guy doesn't even chew the scenery with any aplomb. He just sort of wanders around and yells. Madonna is bad but Madonna is always bad so it's doesn't even leave any kind of impression on you. It's less a movie than a mediocre party that you're glad you left but can't really remember a week later.

 

But A View To A Kill...everyone and everything is so distinctively and uniquely bad. Re-watchably bad. Like 'wait, did I actually hear/see that right?' bad. That snowboarding Beach Boys opening (that isn't even the real Beach Boys!) where Moore literally defies gravity like he's in a goddam Looney Tunes short...Great Grandad Bond sleeping with girls 30+ years younger than he is...that bizarre sex scene with Grace Jones...it's just such an odd but enjoyable mess.

 

PS - I have never understood why people shit on Quantum of Solace so much. Yes, it's a goofy title but I actually appreciate what a lean story it is. I also appreciated that the relationship between Bond & Montes lacked a romantic subtext. In terms of plot and character it's basically just an addendum to Casino Royale but I still thought it was a solid effort.

[Darbler Cheesegarbler 1110]

This wouldn't have been my first choice for a Bond movie either, but I still think it's a great choice. It's one of my favorite serieses's' but I think we can all agree that in terms of HDTGM insanity, the series is an embarrassment of riches. I think Paul, June and Jason will eventually do multiple Bond movies because there's just so much to do, and I think in most of them there are at least some redeeming qualities so they are great for conversation. Jason will also always have plenty of opportunities to talk about his dick and how he would use it to interact with various actresses/characters, and I hope June will talk about how attractive she finds James Bond, or in this case, Roger Moore. In fact, can I just submit some kind of official question here?

 

Here's a question: How does Jason feel Tanya Roberts stacks up to other Bond girls in terms of acting ability and sexuality, and how does June feel about Roger Moore and the other Bond actors given the same criteria? And of course, I need to know how attracted Paul is to May Day and if he would choose her as his #2 henchperson if he were a bond villain.

[demagog_dog 50]

[PlanBFromOuterSpace 3138]

"Crank 10" would be in space. Duh.

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

And of course, I need to know how attracted Paul is to May Day and if he would choose her as his #2 henchperson if he were a bond villain.

 

I don't know about Paul, but I do know I am uncomfortably attracted to May Day. I am kind of a weirdo.

[TekurahMcCullough 21]

I have started watching View to a Kill and can say it is def HDTGM worthy. Maybe more so than some of the other worse Bond movies because in those movies the flaws are sort of obvious. Bad casting, cash grab, trying too hard to keep the jokey Bond element in a post-Austin Powers world.

 

You realize this was filmed in a pre-Austin Powers world, right?

 

But A View To A Kill...everyone and everything is so distinctively and uniquely bad. Re-watchably bad. Like 'wait, did I actually hear/see that right?' bad. That snowboarding Beach Boys opening (that isn't even the real Beach Boys!) where Moore literally defies gravity like he's in a goddam Looney Tunes short...Great Grandad Bond sleeping with girls 30+ years younger than he is...that bizarre sex scene with Grace Jones...it's just such an odd but enjoyable mess.

 

Chris Walken losing a fight with an elderly man atop the Golden Gate bridge...the horrible death of two police officers on a drawbridge played for laughs...

 

I don't know about Paul, but I do know I am uncomfortably attracted to May Day. I am kind of a weirdo.

 

Grace Jones is the best thing about this movie. She looks amaaaaaaazing in every scene, and her death is befitting a fierce warrior bad-ass. Goddammit, I love her.

[firsttimecallerlongtimelistenr 3590]

ive never been a fan of bond films but ill im sure the episode will make this worth watching again. i really love the live episodes. the energy is great and id ask a stupid question too if it meant jason would lash out at me. just a quick question though, looking at he release dates of the episodes, is this the last episode of the year? does this mean there's no Christmas episode this year or are they going to squeeze one in?

[Cameron H. 23786]

 

 

I don't know about Paul, but I do know I am uncomfortably attracted to May Day. I am kind of a weirdo.

 

I am in total agreement with you about May Day. We shall be weirdos together.

 

But to your earlier point regarding QoS, I think my biggest problem with it was how little of an impact it made on me. No, it's not the worst Bond film (that's definitely Die Another Die) it's just that it is so unremarkable, which to me is even more egregious.

[WayneMiller 37]

I watched this recently, and I really liked it. But, then I really like Moonraker. But I'm a big Bond fan, so I'm looking forward to this.

 

I think this'll be a joint with James Bonding, I hope so, as James Bonding are super slow at delivering updated shows. Paul Scheer was on On Her Majesties Secret Service, and they asked him to contribute to AVTAK, along with Chris Hardwick and possibly Doug Benson (Benson's appearance on Diamonds Are Forever, as well as The Man With The Golden Gun (Greg Proops) are high watermark podcasts for James Bonding).

[seanotron 2307]

Grace Jones is a sentient android sculpted out of Martian marble by ancient aliens. No one should feel weird for being attracted to her.

[MondayCity 194]

 

I HATE Skyfall!

It's pronounced "Skyfail," because Bond is completely ineffective and allows the deaths of almost everyone he tries to protect. He even let's the Bond girl get killed after two short scenes, neither of which involved physical intimacy. "The name is 'Bond,' 'Ernest Bond'."

[denimgremlin 1179]

It's pronounced "Skyfail," because Bond is completely ineffective and allows the deaths of almost everyone he tries to protect. He even let's the Bond girl get killed after two short scenes, neither of which involved physical intimacy. "The name is 'Bond,' 'Ernest Bond'."

 

Its so funny on James Bonding they point out how insane it is that this is the first Bond movie where the villain totally wins.

[SlidePocket 707]

just a quick question though, looking at he release dates of the episodes, is this the last episode of the year? does this mean there's no Christmas episode this year or are they going to squeeze one in?

 

I'm hoping there's going to be one after A View to a Kill and before Xanadu, just so that there can't be four live episodes in a row (coupled with Rhinestone and LOL).

[MelissaBecker 79]

 

You realize this was filmed in a pre-Austin Powers world, right?

 

 

 

Yes. I was referencing Die Another Day in the comment as a movie that people were saying is worse but really is probably more of a product of it's time (as a Bond movie trying to be Bond in a post-Austin Powers world and badly trying to be both serious and goofy). Admittedly it wasn't clear in my comment.

[DEATHMAN 3317]

Hahaha holy shit Paul had a 3DO

[Joven 373]

Well ya, it had the best games, like Shadow: War of Succession and Plumbers Don't Wear Ties.

 

 

[Jamie Power 224]

For an amazing podcast double feature I recommend listening to James Bonding: Goldfinger followed by Casino Royale. The contrast between Bonds and between guest reactions is amazing. And now I'll never be able to hear the line "not well" again with a straight face.

[Jamie Power 224]

Also, any time Ian Fleming makes a guest appearance on the podcast is gold(finger/-eneye/-en gun).

[Cameron H. 23786]

Ick.

 

I just finished A View to a Kill and have to say Bond really is too old for Stacey. Maybe he should get with her mom? I hear she has got it going on...

[firsttimecallerlongtimelistenr 3590]

just watched it. cant wait to hear paul and jasons walkens impressions.

 

and was that dolph lundgren?