Episode 98 — John Cochran Again, Our Close Friend

[souprman 10477]

Paul,

 

How is Paul? Or do you call him Pee-Wee? Or are you not allowed to address him directly?

[elizamuffins 4228]

Hey Paul! First off let me just say that "I Love You Beth Cooper" was very underrated and you were great in it. According to Wikipedia ,you were raised Catholic just like me. I like you more knowing we have something in common. One thing we don't have in common is that I grew up on the east coast where we have culture and you grew up in Iowa where they have corn. Or so I have heard, I have never been to Iowa. Anyways, what was that like? All the corn?

[chanson 9697]

Paul,

 

If someone referred to UCB as a "circle jerk" how would that make you feel?

[Just Add Pepper 2026]

Hi Paul,

 

It's a well-known fact that you were born in the state of Iowa, home of the famous metal band Slipknot. It's a lesser known fact that you also were a member of Slipknot for a brief period during high school. What do you think your career would be like today if you hadn't left the band due to creative differences during sophomore year?

[Houston 4819]

Paul,

 

You seem to be a funny person who gets a lot of work. You've appeared in many shows, but you typically only once. Are you the comedic version of beer goggles?

[Houston 4819]

Paul,

 

Forum poster Jakal texted me the following "question" "Paul Rust, more like Paul Bust!' P.S. What is your cup size?"

[Dads for Butt Stuff 753]

Mr Rust, do you keep in touch with Alan "Mr. C." Ruck, and does he have any funny behind the scenes stories from shooting ABC TGIF with Jay Mohr?

[kobthatreal 5896]

Paul, we live in a throw away culture, how do you differentiate between trash and treasure?

 

Paul, why not drop the L in your first name? The latino demographic is rapidly growing. Speak on why that is.

 

Paul, you ever been casting couched? Do you sign anything?

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Hi Paul, any advice for dealing with childhood friends looking for favors?

 

As always, thanks and in memory of Leonard Nimoy, LLAP.

[JaclynnAlexander 258]

Paul,

Did you actually love Beth Cooper?

[Andy Dick Cheney 3779]

Hi Paul

 

Neil Young famously said that "Rust never sleeps".

 

Is this true or are you guys just old friends and he was playin'?

[Sillylillyquee 1015]

Hi Paul!!

 

I'm a huge fan of your work.

 

What's the last song you sang in the shower and/or car?

 

Will you please sing it now?

[Houston 4819]

Paul,

 

1Direction is going on 'hiatus', should I be happy, sad, concerned, or wondering if I am too old to have their posters on my wall? Asking for a friend.

[skizelo 2536]

Rusty, you used to have blonde hair, but now it's black: are you goth?

[JaclynnAlexander 258]

Paul,

Do you still consider yourself a "Cosby" after recent events?

[JaclynnAlexander 258]

Do you think you're only being interviewed by these A-listers because your early episode is more than 6 months old?

[Danny Boy Wizard 1342]

Paul Rust,

 

You are currently on an episode of Hollywood Handbook. How is it going? What do you wish you had done better so far?

 

Should I smoke weed? This guy in my dorm named Tate says it's awesome, but I'm on the fence about it.

 

You were on an episode of Drake and Josh?

 

Thanks,

Danny

[Spunky Foonerism 8561]

Dear Paul, you famously stated in a Playboy interview that acting is easy if you remember that all human behavior is just combinations of the three main emotions: afraid, sleepy, and bonertime. Should a young actor like myself try to train equally in all three, or follow your example and specialize?

[JMonsterface 1974]

Paul, I bit into a really stale pretzel stick and broke off a piece of my tooth and the tooth piece kinda looks like you. What will you give me for it?

[Dads for Butt Stuff 753]

The old saying says you're only interviewed twice on hollywood handbook, once on your way up, and once on your way down. Is this true?

[rod aug 5637]

Paul, fuck much?

[xoValeriexo 4369]

Hey Paul,

 

You created the "secret bit," an additional joke at the end of a live performance that starts 10 minutes after the show ends. So far not a single audience member has waited around long enough to see it. Does it hurt when your art goes unappreciated?

 

Paul,

 

I heard a rumor that if you watch any of your improv performances backwards, you'll hear a demonic voice reciting Martin Lawrence's Wash Yo Ass SNL bit. Is there any truth to this?

[souprman 10477]

Paul,

 

You have amazing hair. Speak on that.

[Andrew 4646]

Dear Paul,

 

A man has to get a fox, a chicken, and a sack of corn across a river. He has a rowboat, and it can only carry him and one other thing. If the fox and the chicken are left together, the fox will eat the chicken. If the chicken and the corn are left together, the chicken will eat the corn. How does the man do it?

 

Kind regards,

 

Andrew

[Dads for Butt Stuff 753]

It's recently come to my attention that v-neck t-shirts are not cool anymore. My wardrobe consists almost entirely of v-neck t-shirts and v-neck sweaters so I'm having more and more trouble leaving the house, as I'm afraid to be publicly ridiculed by al the cool people in crew neck shirts. Do you have any tips for me to overcome this problem quickly? because I'm almost out of toilet paper