Episode 133 - The Quest

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

I forgot what Mulholland Falls was and had to Google it to remember, which led me to finding THIS image of Jennifer Connelly associated with it....

 

Um, I think we know which film everyone on Earth should be seeing. JCVD is one beautiful man, but, with nary a split or shirtless training montage in The Quest, I'd say Mulholland Falls wins out.

 

I couldn't see that, so I google imaged the movie title and found a gif... I need to watch this movie. Because reasons. (Seriously, who DOESN'T have a crush on Jennifer Connelly????)

[jarrycanada 2483]

JCVD is definitely suspect!

 

Mind you he did have a big time well known cocaine addiction problem so that could explain most of it.and struggles with Bipolar

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

Fixed for the benefit of Jennifer Connelly torch-bearers everywhere....

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

Anyway, since we've had two episodes in a row dealing with martial arts mastery, Dim Mak (the "death touch") and other myths associated with the form, I just wanted to share a sample of my brushes with Kung-Fu, my chosen field of study. And by "study," I mean "getting my ass kicked by people more talented and way scarier than me."

 

The cartoonish way movies like The Quest depict "animal" styles certainly has its roots in martial arts, especially Kung-Fu. Concepts are taught by classifying certain types of movement or body control with animals like a tiger, snake, crane, leopard, or yes, even monkey. These animals also have elements and forces associated with them. For example, a tiger is linked with fire which is linked with destruction because they all have to deal with full-force attack and ferocity and the like, while also maintaining control and dominance. I'm not expecting a movie to portray this facet of martial arts realistically, but watching Bruce Lee embody mantis or snake, or the sword fighting in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, are much less ridiculous representations of this idea.

 

My own brush with anything like a "death touch" came from when one day, my teacher (who is so exceptionally intelligent and skilled that I was lucky to be in the same room with him, let alone taught by him) was showing me some very basic striking techniques while sparring with me. He gave me a... love tap to the ribs on my right side, which hurt like hell, but was probably .01% of his full striking power. My right side was a little sore, sure, but over the course of the class, that soreness actually drifted through my chest, along my lungs, and ended up constricting around my heart so that every beat of that life-giving organ also pulsated pain outwards. I didn't even know you could feel anything on the surface of your heart. I started rubbing my chest in discomfort and looked to my teacher, who smiled at me knowingly, lifted up his striking hand, and recreated the positioning he had when he struck me at the beginning of class. it was like he was somehow controlling my chi from a distance, or at the very least, had planted some weird energy-seed in my rib-cage as a demonstration of what it means to really hit somebody to the core of their being. Sure, my teacher could just punch through my rib-cage, grab my heart, and rip it out Kano-from-Mortal-Kombat-style about as easily as I could rip into a Cadbury Creme Egg, but, if he wanted to, he could hit me at maybe %1 of his power and just stop my heart via my pathetic chi. Just if he felt like it. Ever since then, holy shit, I am confident that chi is fucking real. I don't know if it's weird spiritual forces or Earth's electromagnetic field or a gigantic Sharknado we are all constantly embroiled in, but I just thank all the gods that Jason Mantzoukas doesn't believe in that such power is in the hands of someone as patient and noble as my teacher and NOT Frank Dux, who could kick pretty high I guess.

 

Incidentally, I haven't been to Kung-Fu in quite some time because I just suck so bad at it that it became too frustrating and, frankly, embarrassing. I'm 120 pounds soaking wet and my greatest gifts are being clumsy and making Star Wars references on the Internet. When I'm in the room with what amounts to a fucking Jedi, well, it's kinda ridiculous.

[Cockney Mackem 514]

I forgot what Mulholland Falls was and had to Google it to remember, which led me to finding THIS image of Jennifer Connelly associated with it....

 

Um, I think we know which film everyone on Earth should be seeing. JCVD is one beautiful man, but, with nary a split or shirtless training montage in The Quest, I'd say Mulholland Falls wins out.

 

I absolutely hate Mulholland Falls. Not even Jennifer Connelly can save it from being a boring, boring film. If they were showing it on a plane I'd walk out.

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

 

I absolutely hate Mulholland Falls. Not even Jennifer Connelly can save it from being a boring, boring film. If they were showing it on a plane I'd walk out.

 

I agree. I started watching it and was like "this is bad detective work and everyone is stupid." And stopped watching since all I wanted to see happened in the first 15 minutes.

[Quasar Sniffer 4174]

Well, I've never seen it. I guess that's one I can cross off my "To Watch" list.

[SlidePocket 707]

Well, I've never seen it. I guess that's one I can cross off my "To Watch" list.

 

Then you know you will never watch it once it comes from the director of Die Another Day of all things!

[JoelSchlosberg 352]

One minor correction, Ong Bak: Thai Warrior was in modern time, however, the second and third movies were in feudal Siam during the 1400s.

 

Although they do parallel Bloodsport/The Quest in not only their shift to a period setting, but their diminishing returns on a larger scope.

[Lando 2019]

 

And the clown makeup is reminiscent of Octopussy. They never have clown makeup and Roger Moore in the same scene, but then again, the first clown we meet in Octopussy is a completely different agent who is never in the same scene as Bond.

 

And the training camp that Moore sells JCVD is in Phuket, which is about 5 miles away from Scaramanga's island in The Man With The Golden Gun (and I apologize if I just Jim Steinmaned this piece of knowledge. I have been very busy lately both at work and at home and am just trying to catch up on this thread.)

[Cameron H. 23786]

 

And the training camp that Moore sells JCVD is in Phuket, which is about 5 miles away from Scaramanga's island in The Man With The Golden Gun (and I apologize if I just Jim Steinmaned this piece of knowledge. I have been very busy lately both at work and at home and am just trying to catch up on this thread.)

 

STEINMAN!!!!!!

 

[Cameron H. 23786]

I have to say, I found it hilarious how quickly Khao buys Dobbs story that Carrie is journalist. Granted, he's not lying, but Khao had just gotten through telling Dobbs off for being a thieving scoundrel. Dobbs then brushes Khao off and introduces Carrie as an "American journalist" and Khao just eats that shit up! He doesn't ask for any credentials or seem to think Dobbs might be up to his old tricks. I think I'm starting to realize why Dobbs liked working with him so much. In fact, if anyone can send me Khao's email address, I've been in touch with a Nigerian Prince who would very much like to get in contact with him.

 

Also, I'm tickled by just how proud Carrie is at proclaiming how she got her job through nepotism. It is especially apparent that she didn't get her job through talent when, after watching JCVD fight for the first time, she tells Dobbs, "You have to get me this story!" Um...isn't that you're job?

[Joven 373]

Also, I'm tickled by just how proud Carrie is at proclaiming how she got her job through nepotism. It is especially apparent that she didn't get her job through talent when, after watching JCVD fight for the first time, she tells Dobbs, "You have to get me this story!" Um...isn't that you're job?

 

Did she though? On one hand, she says her father owns the paper, but I got the sense that she saw through Dobbs' nonsense but found him interesting, and was inflating her own importance. So, oh, you're a lord...well my father owns the New York Times. Having fun by bullshitting a bullshitter.

 

I mean I'm not 100% sure on that, one could make the case that if she wasn't connected why would they send her across the world to "get her out of our hair" instead of just firing her...but on the other hand, if she was, why would you ever tell her that? Plus, the guy on the phone didn't recognize her by her by name immediately.

[Famous Mortimer 5]

I can't find the link to the reply interview with Sheldon Lettich that's mentioned at the end of the episode, re: Bloodsport. Anyone have a link?

[H.P.Hovercraft 119]

Can we have a Howl special HDTGM mini-series where various comedians come on and talk about Paul's legs?

[taylor anne photo 11311]

I think it was Paul who talked about "The Worst Idea of All Time" in Paul's Picks a while ago, but even if he wasn't those guys joined up with The Thrilling Adventure Hour to perform the script of Grown Ups 2 as they've remembered it live and it's fucking hilarious.

[Cameron H. 23786]

 

Did she though? On one hand, she says her father owns the paper, but I got the sense that she saw through Dobbs' nonsense but found him interesting, and was inflating her own importance. So, oh, you're a lord...well my father owns the New York Times. Having fun by bullshitting a bullshitter.

 

I mean I'm not 100% sure on that, one could make the case that if she wasn't connected why would they send her across the world to "get her out of our hair" instead of just firing her...but on the other hand, if she was, why would you ever tell her that? Plus, the guy on the phone didn't recognize her by her by name immediately.

 

Interesting...

 

Yeah, I guess I assumed she was on the level considering she didn't come off as particularly shrewd and the server introduced her as someone with "Castles in Scotland." I figured if she wasn't what she said she was, then the waiter would have had to be in on it too. Which brings up the question again: what was she even doing there? If it wasn't for the tournament, which (as it was portrayed in the movie) she had no prior knowledge of before meeting Dobbs, what exactly was she covering?

 

But, you bring up a good point about the guy on the phone a) not getting her name right and b ) saying she was sent there to "get her out of [their] hair." If she was the daughter of the owner, there's no reason why he would not know who she was or how to say her name. And if she wasn't his daughter, then it seems more cost effective to just fire her rather than pay her to cover an area of the world they apparently have no interest in...

 

I did like the fact that she was finally able to convince him to maybe run her story about a secret blood fight in the middle of nowhere. It's like the movie itself wasn't even interested in the plot of the movie.

[Lando 2019]

I know that Punch Out has been brought up as inspiration for this, and maybe it seems so obvious because of the JCVD connection but honestly I got a Street Fighter II (in a quasi realistic manner) vibe from a lot of the fighters. The Spanish guy seemed like Vega without claws or a mask, the Japanese guy obviously E. Honda and the Brazillian Guy seemed like a pre-transformation Blanka.

[FisterRoboto 7499]

I think it was Paul who talked about "The Worst Idea of All Time" in Paul's Picks a while ago, but even if he wasn't those guys joined up with The Thrilling Adventure Hour to perform the script of Grown Ups 2 as they've remembered it live and it's fucking hilarious.

The Worst Idea of All Time is in my podcast backlog. I'm currently working my way through Blank Check w/ Griffin and David and Black Men Can't Jump in Hollywood. But a team-up with some of the WorkJuice all-stars might be just what I need to start digging into that one (even if Annie Savage isn't in the mix).

[taylor anne photo 11311]

The Worst Idea of All Time is in my podcast backlog. I'm currently working my way through Blank Check w/ Griffin and David and Black Men Can't Jump in Hollywood. But a team-up with some of the WorkJuice all-stars might be just what I need to start digging into that one (even if Annie Savage isn't in the mix).

When I first started listening I thought they just wrote a movie that sounded like something Adam Sandler would make but was bumped up to 11 and then my brain exploded when I found out it was actually fucking Grown Ups 2.

 

And now listening to the rest of it makes me so angry that this man and everyone who works with him has millions of dollars.

[Amy the Gorilla 732]

I wish I could get rich by being stupid on camera.

[Cameron H. 23786]

The Worst Idea of All Time is in my podcast backlog. I'm currently working my way through Blank Check w/ Griffin and David and Black Men Can't Jump in Hollywood. But a team-up with some of the WorkJuice all-stars might be just what I need to start digging into that one (even if Annie Savage isn't in the mix).

 

I got about 13 or so episodes into The Worst Idea of All Time before I finally gave up on it. It wasn't that it was bad, just that I got bored with the premise after awhile. I think, had I jumped in on the ground floor (with a week between episodes, instead of trying to listen to them in a row) I might have stayed on board. It's kind of the same way I feel about the Gilmore Guys. I love what I've heard of the podcast, but my feelings about the show itself (which I didn't like, then grew to enjoy in an ironic way, and now can't stand at all) made it so I couldn't listen to them talk about it anymore. I think I may just jump ahead and listen to GG episodes with guests that I enjoy and call it quits. That's just me, of course. I'm sure opinions will vary.

 

But, you bring up a couple of interesting questions: What podcasts are in everyone's backlog, and what podcasts are you currently trying to catch up on?

 

For me...

 

Catching Up

 

1) Oh No Ross and Carey

2) Judge John Hodgman (I may drop this one. It's not like I don't like it, but it's one of those "If you've heard one episode, you've heard them all" kind of deals. I find I've lost some interest...)

 

Backlog:

 

1) Sawbones

2) Philosophize This!

3) The British History Podcast

4) You Must Remember This

5) Myths and Legends

[Lando 2019]

4) You Must Remember This

 

I really want to give this a shot once my backlog is clear.

[Lando 2019]

Can we please get back to talking about man buns?

 

 

 

[FisterRoboto 7499]

My current catch-ups:

1) Blank Check - David Sims (film critic for The Atlantic and formerly for AV Club) and actor Griffin Newman started the podcast as a way of analyzing the Star Wars prequels as films in their own merit. The first miniseries was simply asking, "What is The Phantom Menace about?" They actually give some quality analysis and helped me see some things in the prequels that I had never picked up on, and - most importantly - it's not just bashing on the prequels, which is a pretty tired schtick, as we've talked about on these very forums. After making their way through the Star Wars films, they switched gears and decided to focus on filmmakers who, like George Lucas, were incredibly successful early in their career and allowed to do pretty much whatever they wanted afterwards. They're currently almost done with M Night Shyamalan's filmography, and I'm not sure what's up next, but it's been a lot of fun catching up on this one.

2. Black Men Can't Jump (in Hollywood) - I actually found out about this one because David and Griffin mentioned it during their episode on The Force Awakens. This podcast reviews movies with POC leads and talks a lot about representation. I've only listened to a couple episodes so far, but the live Hancock episode is pretty excellent.

 

Backlog:

Reply All

The Worst Idea of All Time

I Was There Too (I've listened to some of them, but I'm REALLY far behind)

Beautiful Stories (this one just started, but I love the premise, and I need to get on it before it gets too far along)

 

Also, this seems like as good a time as any to bring up Lexi Alexander's appearance on Fatman on Batman last week. I don't recall it having come up in another thread yet, but it's delightful. I'm not a big Kevin Smith fan, so I tend to avoid this podcast, but I couldn't resist Lexi talking about Punisher in the new Daredevil series (also, Smith's not in this episode).