Episode 152 - Mike And Dave, Our Wedding Dates Not Needers

[Fabio's Socks 1822]

I would like vladislav to be a guest on either CBB the podcast, or CBB the TV show. After that, I'd like him to have his own weekly podcast.

 

I donated 50 big ones one time, so you owe me this Scripps!

 

Good luck. I doubt Aukerman wants to host a guest who could expose the dark underside of his Earwolf empire. I bet Vladislav mysteriously "disappears" as soon as Scott finds out the boys have looped him in for ad reads.

[SaltPeanuts 479]

If anyone doesn't like this episode I've created a backwards version. Simply listen to this track in its entirety and your brain will forget you ever heard the original episode.

 

[chicknsandwich 2495]

Come on, Judy. Relax and enjoy your lunch

 

(Only 90s kids will get this reference)

 

i eat YOUR lunch!

 

only 00s kids will get this reference.

[kobthatreal 5896]

I haven't listened yet, but I want both Hayes and Sean to know that I actually prefer Dave Chappelle over Dave Ferguson.

 

It's really no knock on Dave Ferguson I just think that Chappelle is a more well rounded comedian, I mean who are we kidding the guy is a comedy juggernaut. (im the juggernaut biiiitch! lmao) i would kill to hear Chappelle say that! Do you guys think he likes comic books and shit? Im not really into them but the clips online where they voice over the juggernaut is really funny.

 

 

Now for a bit of a knock on Dave Ferguson, sorry pal, nobody goes through this show without a dip into my pressure cooker. Dont worry, the waters fine. Oops, I mean BRINE. Dont get too salty after this one .

 

I went on to Fergusons twitter and the first thing I noticed is that he has a little picture and a big picture. In the little picture we see Dave smiling with big ol' headphones around his neck. it doesnt seem like theres any reason for them, but i turned to the big picture. In the big picture Dave has a tablet of some sort with a finished game of solitaire(kinda lonely) and unlike a normal human being, who would hold it around waist level as if it were a diploma or good grades, he holds his up to his ears as if to say "My Brain Does Not Work Without Technology." Thats when I saw the earwolf photos. Thats when I learned that Dave isnt some slave to the latest tech(although he can be seen with electric headphones on) but

 

 

 

DAVE FERGUSON IS ACTUALLY A PROP COMIC. I mean, how dumb does he think we are? How Dumb do sean and hayes think we are? Trying to pass off Dave Ferguson as Dave Chappelle? They don't even look alike. I'm done. I can't keep following a podcast of lies and mistrust.

[Rose_Cream 1246]

pic 3. Looks like dat boy Sean has been getting busy in the Cutthroat Kitchen.

 

That looks nothing like Sean- plz don't disgrace our family name Chris

[Ban on Stuff 460]

Good stuff guys, keep it goin'.

[AndrewGoll 1211]

We all know that Hayes wrote all the good jokes on HBO's 'Vice Principals'. So when I saw this, I knew it was no accident. I also believe its a key piece of evidence in the last scene of the show, because this is also the last student we see as well!!! I know who did it.

 

It was Sean!!! He was getting jealous of Hayes spending time on the show.

[WallyScreenshots 88]

I haven't listened yet, but I want both Hayes and Sean to know that I actually prefer Dave Chappelle over Dave Ferguson.

 

I saw this clip of Dave Chappelle on the Reddit page for internet videos yesterday. It had him talking on a stage to people who were just sitting in chairs listening, like a TED Talk, but for fun. It was great, it was about how everything is the ladies' fault because they like feelings so much. Most of the ladies seemed uncomfortable, but all the guys, who were strong and cool, stood up from their chairs and clapped and I did too even though I was alone. But I liked it because it validated all of my opinions about women.

[Charlie Murphy Brown 4977]

HHFFFL Week Six POWER RANKINGS, brought to you by Stevie Nicks' flower spankings:

 

1. The New Hampshire Diarrhea Idiots (5-1)

2. The Flint Mi Marc-Maron-i And Cheeses (5-1)

3. Roy Scheider, the Marines, Sean & Hayes, NE Patriots & big dinosaur from Jurassic World (5-1)

4. Made with real Koenig Sugar (4-2)

5. Knights of Columbus & the Power of David Bowie (4-2)

6. Mutant League Football, ASMR Videos, Gluten, Chrs Hrdwck & Bela Lugosi as Dracula (3-3)

7. The War of Northern Aggression (3-3)

8. Team Joes Lerini (3-3)

9. The Winnipeg Murder (3-3)

10. The Lochteaser Freezer (3-3)

11. The Time Teacher called me 'probably just a bad egg' to my mom & Other Half of Handcuff (3-3)

12. Dick Jokes, vaping hard af & blowing clouds & being smartest kid in class but not doing any work (2-4)

13. The Pietá & the Memory of Big Floppy Guy (2-3)

14. Fart Sound, 4 vintage Weird Tales & YakkoWakko.com (2-4)

15. Engineer in the Headlights (0-5)

16. Ledecky Don't Know Defense (0-6)

 

Week Seven match-ups will be released tomorrow. All-Pro-Star-Bowl rosters are nearly complete. A big thanks to you all for making this the best satirical fantasy football league probably in the history of sports

[Larry Birdemic 588]

Now that we are in the part of the week where there is no new episode for a whole bunch of days I feel it's time to confess something; I've never listened to the Paul Shore episode.

 

It's downloaded on my device but I'm afraid to listen. I heard he's being mean and Imam afraid. But I guess now I could just listen to it backwards if I don't want. What should this boy do? Guide me forums you have never steered me wrong before.

[Charlie Murphy Brown 4977]

you must listen. it is your density

 

[Hayzie Bone 843]

I was remembering the popcorn gallery today and thinking about it again.

 

The guest is Jen D'Angelo. Questions should be about comedy and how to make sure people love it.

[souprman 10477]

Jen, your mic-stand work is so unique I was wondering if that's a choice or if it just comes naturally.

[mwn 5470]

Dear Jen,

 

The British Veterinary Association recently said that pugs are so intensely malformed and prone to disease that it's basically cruelty to buy them or breed them and they shouldn't exist anymore. How can I better enjoy comedy now that I know this?

 

Thank you,

mwn

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

Dear Jen,

How can I be funnier than my father in law? We have a big dinner coming up and he always makes my sweetheart laugh way harder than I ever have. I'm afraid she's going to leave me for her dad or someone who looks similar, like Dustin Hoffman.

Thanks, love your work, chief.

JeffreyParties

[thejjar 5031]

Jen, you're from Philadelphia yet you haven't worked for "It's always Sunny IN Philadelphia". Care to comment on the beef?

[lizzy 1946]

Jen, how do you make sure people love comedy?

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

Dear Jen,

Does having an apostrophe in your name ever get in the way of professional opportunities?

Thanks,

Corpsefucker Shitlord

[Ban on Stuff 460]

Hey why's it called "telling" jokes? You're really just saying them. What are you trying to pull?

[lizzy 1946]

PS Larry I was worried about that too but honestly it's just great and weird and funny. Also Cody fuckin kills it that episode.

[souprman 10477]

Jen,

 

Have you ever thought of serving tea and crumpets to your comedy audience to make sure they enjoy themselves?

 

Thanks,

British Andrew.

[elizamuffins 4228]

Jen,

 

I hope you have been listening to this pod because it's been really great lately. Aren't Hayes and Sean the best? Shouldn't they be more famous than The Doughboys? Their comedy is much more sophisticated and they are better looking. They have better looking wives and they also dress better. I don't get it.

[JeffBurtMacklinMarra 6724]

Dear Jen,

My brother is faster than me, but I'm way funnier. Is there any way to use humor to win a footrace?

Thanks,

The Narnold

[Joe Lerini 7329]

Jen D'Angelo,

 

The following question is untitled: How does it feel?

[FaceLikeThunder 2114]

Jen

 

My post-to-like ratio is suffering, any tips for adding some pizazz and hopefully some dank hot lava comedy smoulderies to my forum presence?