New Catchphrase Suggestions

48976 topics in this forum

1. I Whispered To Your Sister and She Wants Me To Fist Her

   By El Chico Malo, July 11, 2020
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   • El Chico Malo
   • July 11, 2020

2. If bananas need a hammock what do peaches need?

   By Andy Daly's Third Cousin, July 11, 2020
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   • Andy Daly's Third Cousin
   • July 11, 2020

3. Plato said you can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation. What I've learned from that is people who do comedy actually age must faster like dogs, but they live a more joyful life and bring more joy to others.

   By Andy Daly's Third Cousin, July 11, 2020
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   • Andy Daly's Third Cousin
   • July 11, 2020

4. Aristotle said we are what we repeatedly do. Empirically, I have proven this to be false because I have not turned into a sheep.

   By Andy Daly's Third Cousin, July 11, 2020
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   • Andy Daly's Third Cousin
   • July 11, 2020

5. One cannot conceive anything so strange and so implausible that it has not already been said by one comedian or another.

   By Andy Daly's Third Cousin, July 11, 2020
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   • Andy Daly's Third Cousin
   • July 11, 2020

6. If a tree picks itself up off the ground, does anyone hear it make a sound? Fuck no, that tree ain't a punk, it has a family, it's working its ass off to make those duckets and doesn't have time to whine like a little bitch sapling. 

   By Andy Daly's Third Cousin, July 11, 2020
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   • Andy Daly's Third Cousin
   • July 11, 2020

7. Tell me, my lovely, was your father a thief who stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes? Clearly not, I can't even look at you because you're crosseyed like a billy goat after it eats its third soda can of the day. 

   By Andy Daly's Third Cousin, July 11, 2020
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   • Andy Daly's Third Cousin
   • July 11, 2020

8. Damned if you do? Don't mind if I do!

   By Mr. Popper's Penis, July 10, 2020
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   • Mr. Popper's Penis
   • July 10, 2020

9. I’ve got a belly like a bowl full of triglycerides and cholesteryl ester.

   By TootyBut2DButt, July 10, 2020
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   • TootyBut2DButt
   • July 10, 2020

10. Honk if you’re wet for Tibet.

    By TootyBut2DButt, July 10, 2020
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    • TootyBut2DButt
    • July 10, 2020

11. Mayo is the lube of the sandwich

    By b.u.t.t.cheeks, July 10, 2020
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    • b.u.t.t.cheeks
    • July 10, 2020

12. Donating my body to science-fiction film franchises. JJ Abrams, here I come.

    By MisterOriginality, July 10, 2020
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    • MisterOriginality
    • July 10, 2020

13. When Dachshunds take over the Earth, they’ll appoint me their ally. At least I hope so. Otherwise why do I keep buying treats for all these random Dachshunds?

    By Euripides’ Shorts, July 10, 2020
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    • Euripides’ Shorts
    • July 10, 2020

14. That wiener dog’s got buns, hon! I mean literally. It’s wearing a hotdog costume.

    By Euripides’ Shorts, July 10, 2020
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    • Euripides’ Shorts
    • July 10, 2020

15. It’s like Waterloo over here. Only replace the “loo” with “works.” Waterworks. I’m crying.

    By Euripides’ Shorts, July 10, 2020
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    • Euripides’ Shorts
    • July 10, 2020

16. "Life's too short." - Queef Witherspoon

    By Pete the Meat, July 10, 2020
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    • Pete the Meat
    • July 10, 2020

17. The Mummy, more like the BUMMY, I'm saying that the Mummy is a BURDEN ON SOCIETY.

    By LARDdischarge, July 10, 2020
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    • LARDdischarge
    • July 10, 2020

18. I’m sick of reboots. They gotta get these boots right the first time, man.

    By MisterOriginality, July 10, 2020
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    • MisterOriginality
    • July 10, 2020

19. If you peel my rutabaga I’ll cream your corn.

    By Euripides’ Shorts, July 10, 2020
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    • Euripides’ Shorts
    • July 10, 2020

20. Show me a room full of Dachshunds in party hats and I’ll show you a happy onlooker—me!

    By Euripides’ Shorts, July 10, 2020
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    • Euripides’ Shorts
    • July 10, 2020

21. Binge on fruit, down the chute, then reboot.

    By Euripides’ Shorts, July 10, 2020
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    • 237 views
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    • Euripides’ Shorts
    • July 10, 2020

22. To Xfinity and beyond what I can afford to pay for cable

    By Qui-Gon Jinn and Tonic, July 10, 2020
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    • Qui-Gon Jinn and Tonic
    • July 10, 2020

23. I didn't get my PPP loan, but I did get my Pee Pee Poo loan.

    By Sgt. Assssface, July 10, 2020
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    • Sgt. Assssface
    • July 10, 2020

24. The way things have been going recently we should cancel culture.

    By TootyBut2DButt, July 9, 2020
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    • TootyBut2DButt
    • July 9, 2020

25. I’m a Loser, I’m a Boozer, I drive a PT Cruiser

    By El Chico Malo, July 9, 2020
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    • 311 views
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    • El Chico Malo
    • July 9, 2020