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This is Me! Cakebug! I've missed you all! Since I've been gone, walking a Tightrope of academia, I've had A Million Dreams about presenting a film which will help the forum Come Alive because, as I know, with this discerning crowd, too much is Never Enough. So let's Rewrite the Stars and realize that From Now On, you'll have a new guilty pleasure musical. Come with me to The Other Side. Ladies and Gents, This is the Moment You've Waited For... Hugh Jackman Whoa-oh-oh-oh!

I know the nipple clamps were mentioned but that one cop is just staring at them and asks "Hows this thing work?" It's right there in the name. They are nipple clamps, they clamp nipples. They work by opening them and then closing them on the nipple thus clamping the nipple. What part of this is hard to understand or follow? He didn't ask "Why would somebody enjoy these?" or "How do you use these in sex?" which might have deeper more nuanced answers. No. He simple wants to know how something that looks like a clothes pin and called a "nipple clamp" works. No wonder Madonna got off with stellar cops like that.

Was anybody really confused seeing Joe Mantegna show up in court as a DA? Am I alone in this? I thought he was a detective up until that point. I mean maybe I need a lawyer in here to correct me but I'm pretty sure most DAs are far to busy to be showing up at crime scenes before there is even a suspect or before all the evidence has been collected. Not to mention following an investigation through every step of the way with the police and even conducting witness interrogation. Here I thought they sat in their office until a suspect had been arrested and evidence gather. At this point the case would be assigned to them and then they'd begin working on. Who am I to argue with this air tight and thoroughly researched script.

I think Madonna was so excited to see the birthday cake during the dinner scene because it had burning candles on it, and she new hot candles were in her and Willem Dafoe’s futures.

I haven't seen Legend. I suppose I need to rectify that.

It's a horrible role but I liked Tim Curry's terrorist in McHale's Navy. It wasn't a good role but he tried his best. Clue is definitely my favorite. He was also in a Hercule Poirot episode, Appointment with Death, as an archeologist.

On the subject of house boats vs. float homes and why single ladies might be drawn to them. While it does seem that house boats in Portland are referred to as float homes in real estate listings the fact is that in all of my 10 years of living in Portland I only, ever, heard them referred to as house boats. When I was looking for a place to live after liberating myself from an unhappy marriage I seriously considered renting a HOUSE BOAT. Rent was often cheaper for a place floating on the river than comparable houses on land, a big plus for one surviving on restaurant wages such as I was. Also, I dreamt it would be freeing to feel the rush of the river beneath me, bringing the promise of strength and boundless possibility. But, alas, it wasn't to be because I was not childless and decided it would be too stressful to live in a house surrounded by water with a young child. So, I get you single ladies of the 80's and 90's.

haha an "awooga" old timey horn would be perfect

Not only is the Portland police department incompetent, I would also throw in the DA’s office and the defense team. DA Yes, the arrest of Madonna was far too soon, because at that time they had no concrete evidence. But what was even more egregious, is when Joe Mantegna decides to have Anne Archer disclose, in a meeting with the defense, that she witnessed Madonna snort cocaine. Why would the DA reveal this major bomb and not hold the reveal for when she’s in front of the jury! The DA only has to show the defense who they are calling to the stand, not what they are going to reveal. Defense If cocaine use on Madonna’s part was such a big “what if,” why didn’t Willem Dafoe make her do a drug test? A hair test can find cocaine with up to 90 days of use. Yes, Madonna may have in fact used cocaine… but she was so adamant she did not and this would be a win for the defense if that test came back negative. And one off topic comment… did anyone else think that Anne Archer was going to be the person who shot Madonna at the end??? That would have been far more interesting since she did in fact love her boss and received a far less payout in the will. I mean this would have been a big “Who did that?!" moment since the doctor was knocked out from the fall. To me that was a huge missed opportunity.

As a Portlander, I have to say that I was a bit disappointed that for the live show here we got the perplexing 2:22 instead of Body of Evidence, a film produced during a particularly dismal era of movies shot or taking place in Portland (there was also Dr. Giggles, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues and The Temp... we did get Drug Store Cowboy, though, so it wasn't all bad during the '90's). Still, I'm glad this movie finally made it onto the Podcast. Okay, not to get all Bullitt chase scene on this film, but the opening bridge crossing scene was, from a local perspective ...interesting. One of Portland's nicknames is "Bridge City," as we have quite a few bridges linking the east and west sides of the city over the Willamette River. Towards the beginning of the film, we see Willem Defoe's character driving across the Fremont Bridge (a raised suspension bridge with these distinct triangle-shaped trusses) from the north/northeast going west into the city. That's all well and good, but then the very next shot shows him driving east across a two-way cantilever bridge which is named the Hawthorne Bridge, and is geographically four bridges southward from the Fremont Bridge. This scene is cut in a way to make it look like he's driving on the same bridge, but in reality he's essentially driving across one bridge and going through downtown to get to another bridge to go back almost in the direction he came from, and doing in a matter of seconds what Google maps approximates would take 15 minutes to accomplish (traffic permitting). Even odder still, it appears that, in an establishing scene, Defoe's character's law office is in Downtown Portland (located in the southwest section of the city), so why is he driving from the north/northeast area in the evening to get to the southeast section of the city? The 90's-era neo-noir with Linda Fiarntino Jason was trying to remember is The Last Seduction, and it is an underrated and amazing film. It's a must-see along with Red Rock West , A Simple Plan, Devil In a Blue Dress, and One False Move.

If it had been revealed at the end that Madonna and Anne Archer were lovers the movie would've fallen into "The Dead/Evil Lesbian Cliche." Which as the name suggests, is that when gay women appear on film or tv they end up dead, evil or both. There are long lists of examples. Hollywood's record of this has improved slightly in recent years but in 1993, the year after gay protests against Basic Instinct, it could've been extra offensive. I do not suggest that the filmmakers avoided that twist *for* that reason, but it's probably for the best that they did.

Lawyer here, Conflict of interest issues may arise if you sleep with a new client or any client whether a relation existed before or not. In general, probably not a good idea to represent a spouse or a close family member, especially if the stakes are high. While I have helped out some close family members and friends in the past without issues, there have been a few issues when it comes down to payment, or even how much time you put into the case. Demands can get high and sometimes unrealistic just because they may think you’ll treat them extra special and use some special law you don’t use on others. So, as the gentleman said on the recording, it depends on timing of relationship, but even then would you want to? I say it depends on the case, and the attorneys level of comfort with the area of law.

The hosts kept talking about how that was Willem Dafoe’s stepson that we see early on in the film, but I don’t recall anything explicitly said that would indicate he is not actually his own son. The awkwardness of their conversation seemed more a case of Dafoe being the stereotypical clueless, workaholic dad. The one thing I did notice, however, is when Dafoe and his son leave the restaurant, the kid puts on a Chicago Bulls hat. That is a bold move considering they live in Portland and the Trail Blazers had just just to the Bulls in the NBA Finals in 1992. I assume we never see the kid again for the rest of the film because he was beaten to death by the repressed residents of Portland who weren’t having kinky sex as a way of releasing their energy and frustration.

Recorded live from Washington, D.C., Paul, June and Jason discuss the 1993 erotic thriller Body of Evidence starring Madonna and Willem Dafoe. They talk about the sassiest judge of all time, the houseboat, the parking garage sex scene, and much more.

When Paul was wondering if he saw a vagina, I half-wondered if he was going to mention the giant flowing curtains that parted suggestively as DaFoe's character was staring at the houseboat. I think that sequence must have been storyboarded by Georgia O'Keefe.

I mean, kind of yeah? Or I'll put it another way: if a movie isn't saying anything, then in my judgment it's lacking. The best films have something to say. Yes, even seemingly light entertainments like Star Wars. Now, it's entirely possible the movie doesn't intend to say anything about historical events and is instead a commentary on something else, but whatever else I can think of seems kind of muddled and inconsistent to me. Like the "floating like a feather" idea. It's nice, but do the events of the movie actually support it? There are several occasions where Forrest makes active choices: disobeying Lt. Dan and going back to save people, buying the shrimp boat, running across the country, etc., that result in further fame and fortune for him. He didn't completely float through life. So what is the movie saying here? If he truly did float through and got by on pure luck, that might amount to a consistent statement about life or humanity, but the movie keeps hedging its bets.

Insert your own "dream of the 90s" joke here. But yes, wonderful movies all and I would add Romeo Is Bleeding to that list (though I think like Red Rock West, it was made in the 80s). The Last Seduction costars the interesting actor and director Peter Berg and has an amusing and memorable supporting role for Bill Pullman too. Edited to add what I meant to add in the first place: a much better 90s channelling of classic Double Indemnity/Postman Always Rings Twice style noir is the also underrated film of The Hot Spot, based on the pulp novel by Charles Williams (who also wrote Dead Calm), directed by Dennis Hopper, starring Don Johnson, Virginia Madsen, and Jennifer Connelly. It's not quite Body Heat quality, but it's well worth checking out, especially since it used the same "woman fucks her partner to death" device, albeit in a different way. Edited again to add more information about The Hot Spot and to consistently italicize film titles, because OCD.

I've never gotten why the elevator door opens and closes at the end of this scene. I always forget how this movie ends and assume someone important sees them screwing or that it'll be crucial to the plot but no, just phantom doors opening and closing. Maybe it's the phantom person who keeps cluing Julianne Moore into Dafoe's whereabouts.

For what it's worth, director Uli Edel had a pretty solid career going until Body of Evidence. His 1981 film Christiane F. is a major cult classic in Europe and based on a very popular biographical novel (available in English as "Zoo Station"). It's kind of a druggy downer but the lead performance is great and you get a real feel for early 1980s Berlin. I can't recommend it enough, if you enjoy that sort of film. Edel's first English language film was 1989's Last Exit to Brooklyn with Jennifer Jason Leigh and based on the novel by Hubert Selby Jr (who you may know as the writer of Requiem for a Dream). As you might expect, it's a depressing drama about working class struggle among the 1950s Brooklyn nightlife. It was a critical hit and led to interest in Selby's writing, who at that point had been an unknown primarily read by beatniks and junkies, and likely led to the adaptation of Requiem for a Dream. So you have two great films based on semi biographical novels, with the screenplays cowritten by the director. Body of Evidence was a vehicle for Madonna though, and Dino De Laurentis shopped around until he found a script he thought suited the pop star's oversexed persona. It was written by a nobody (Brad Mirman, who went on to cowrite Highlander 3) and Edel wasn't allowed any input on it. He probably jumped at the chance to work with De Laurentis and Madonna. You can't blame him. I think this film is directed reasonably well, although the script outright sucks and Madonna is aggressively mediocre. If anything, it's a weird portrait of a time when Madonna absolutely ruled pop culture with her sexy sexy sex. (It's also a rare film to prominently feature Portland, Oregon.)

The judge’s name is Mabel Burnham. Is this meant to be a warning to Willem Dafoe that Madonna “may burn him”, either figuratively by helping her get away with murder (allegedly) or literally with the candle wax? Also, I was glad to see the hosts love the judge so much, but was disappointed they didn’t mention the one moment where she yelled “Keep your rude mouths shut or get out of my courtroom!” to the people watching the trial. Rude mouths? I guess lightly murmuring when big revelations occur is considered rude.

I think every performance he gives is great, whether the movie is good or not. I’ve never seen him phone it in. He even did a voice as the main character in a computer game series—Gabriel Knight—where he played a New Orleans supernatural detective and he was awesome doing THAT. Even his Pennywise in the TV version of IT (which has a decent first half and a shitty second half) is iconic. So I can’t choose, although Clue is also a lot of fun. which performance terrified you, Tay-loe? Or did all of them?

I'd like to think that Amazon synopsis of the movie was written by someone who read the novelization of Body of Evidence rather than actually watching it. So was Madonna's relationship with Dafoe real on her part or was it manipulative? The movie seems to suggest that every relationship she has involves an ulterior motive, but in his case I don't know what she had to gain unless she thought he'd take his lawyering up a notch if they were sleeping together. And who is getting that 8 million dollars now Madonna's next of kin or the dead millionaire's?